Contents
- Pregnant, we hate when we touch our stomachs!
- Pregnant women don’t like having their stomachs touched!
- Where does this habit of touching the belly of pregnant women come from?
- A pregnant woman is wrongly considered to have to share her pregnancy
- > They testify
- “Our body is not public! »Laetitia
- “It’s a lack of respect !” Camille
- “Me, it makes me aggressive. ”Sophie
- Why pregnant women don’t like having their stomachs touched
- We have the right to say no!
- In video: 6 lines to avoid touching your belly
- 7 lines to dissuade the “loafers” who do not ask permission!
- > The give-and-take approach
Pregnant, we hate when we touch our stomachs!
Pregnant women don’t like having their stomachs touched!
Bertrand from the service counted, Séverine at the reception, your distant cousin, your mother-in-law, your neighbor … Since you sport a nice round belly, you have the impression that the whole earth wants to touch him ! As if that part of you isn’t yours anymore. Cécile Viénot, liberal psychologist, specialized in the support of pregnant women, deciphers with us this strange mania.
Where does this habit of touching the belly of pregnant women come from?
“For outsiders, this pregnancy does not only belong to the couple, it is not experienced as an intimate story, but rather as a social adventure, ”explains Cécile Viénot. Those around you tend to take ownership of this pregnancy, as if this round belly simply fell into the public space. “It is as if the body had become an object, devoid of thoughts, as if there was suddenly a dissociation between the woman herself and her pregnant belly”, continues the psychologist.
This phenomenon is mainly explained by a movement of projection, especially in women. They identify or project themselves into pregnancy, depending on whether they have already been pregnant or not. What is more, pregnancy is a period of life where intimacy is less present, especially at the level of medical follow-up. The woman goes regularly to the gynecologist or the midwife, where she has to undress, weigh herself … And her privacy takes a hit. In general, we tend to mistakenly consider that a pregnant woman must share her pregnancy, whereas in the end, it is up to her to decide.
> They testify
“Our body is not public! »Laetitia
“When you are pregnant, it looks like your belly is free…. It is frankly not pleasant! I don’t and I don’t like being done to me, unless it’s daddy and my kids. It is not because we are carrying a baby that our body is public! “
“It’s a lack of respect !” Camille
” IM shy. For me, it’s disrespectful to touch a stomach without asking, especially from a man. I stepped back and said to them: “My stomach is my privacy”. Or else I crossed my arms! “
“Me, it makes me aggressive. ”Sophie
“The last time someone did that, I stroked her breasts, so she understands that it doesn’t happen!” She never did it again! She was the wife of my partner’s best friend. “
Why pregnant women don’t like having their stomachs touched
In the common imagination, pregnancy is something wonderful, a magical moment in the life of a woman. However, “more and more women admit that they have a bad experience with their pregnancy and the transformations of their bodies, without necessarily having a bad experience of becoming a mother,” notes Cécile Viénot. Because we know, during pregnancy, everything is not always rosy! There are even things that we absolutely hate! Also, when we want to touch the belly of a pregnant woman, we think we are in a shared pleasure, while this is not necessarily the case …
We have the right to say no!
It brings the woman back to this idea of pregnancy ”fun”Which she does not necessarily feel, in her state that she can already have difficulty bearing. Touching our stomachs while we are pregnant, the outside person dispossess us of our pregnancy, sort of trying to get hold of it. However, some women prefer that their pregnancy remains of the order of the intimate, like a project that only two people experience. “The woman must keep her free will”, advises the psychologist. “Do not hesitate to explain to the other that we do not want today, but that we will invite him later to come and touch the belly if this changes during pregnancy. ”
>>>>>> To read also: they tell us the exasperating tips of pregnancy
Find these replicas in video:
In video: 6 lines to avoid touching your belly
7 lines to dissuade the “loafers” who do not ask permission!
> The give-and-take approach
“And me, can I touch your belly?” “
> The poet approach
“To my rounded belly, if you dare to touch it, it won’t be pretty, how you’re going to morfle!” “
> The ironic approach
“Please don’t be embarrassed, I love having my stomach touched by an (almost) stranger, it’s my biggest fantasy!” “
> The political approach
“Does consent mean anything to you?” “
> The intrusion approach
“It’s cool, like that, if he moves for the first time, you’ll be informed before I do!” “
> The descriptive approach
“It’s nice to want to communicate with my baby, except that between your hand and him, there is incidentally … my belly!” “
> The infantilizing approach
“Oh, she’s nice, Madam, on the other hand she’s going to remove her big papattes from my container, otherwise the mother-to-be will get very angry!” “
L’expert : Cécile Viénot is a liberal psychologist in Paris, specializing in support for pregnant women and in therapeutic work with children and adolescents.