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The mind has many characteristics and one of them is that it will always put us in the worst so that we are prepared in case it happens
It happens to all of us that in certain circumstances or situations, our mind is unable to think positive. And we strive, because we strive ad nauseam, to change bad thoughts for better ones, to try to “see the light” at the end of the tunnel, but it is impossible for us … Why is this happening? According to the psychologist Patricia López Recio, a specialist in behavior therapy for adults, an expert in acceptance and commitment and behavior therapy in the child and adolescent population, it is the pressure of what is happening that prevents us look on the bright side.
«It is not that one is not able to look at the bright side of things, it is that when we have a low mood, we tend to be negative, be more apathetic and have no hope “, says the psychologist of Psycho-storytelling, with consultations in Madrid and also the possibility of doing the therapies through Skype. As Patricia López Recio says, having that attitude makes it difficult to find the positive things, but there are. «There are always positive things throughout the day. What you have to do is focus your attention on other kinds of things. In consultation we work a lot about say good things that have happened in the last 24 hours. For example: I went to buy and the bread they gave me at the bakery was white, which is how I like it, the bus driver and anything else have smiled at me. It is not about looking for great things, but about refocusing attention, “he says.
This work, which seems easy, actually requires considerable time and appropriate therapies to redirect those thoughts. «You have to work on looking for the positive things. Because of the low mood I have, I will tend to see the negative part and it is about take action to find the good part or those little positive situations that have happened throughout the day. You have to work to find them because they are not going to come out first, ”explains expert Patricia López Recio.
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Learn to manage your thoughts
Everyone is negative, however the difference is in what you do with negativity. Do you express and recreate it? Do you transform it? The psychologist says that everyone tends to be negativeSuch that the mind is at its worst because it is its function to protect us, but that «the difference between one and the other is in how we handle those thoughts. The fact of the matter is not whether or not we have bad thoughts, but how we handle them.
«What the mind wants is that let’s be prepared for whatever may arise, so that we take out all the internal resources. If he tells us ‘nothing is going to happen’ and finally it is a lion that we face, that lion eats us. On the other hand, if that mind tells us ‘hey, watch out, it could be a lion’, we are prepared to fight a lion, not a little kitten. That works like this in all minds, and whoever says otherwise is lying, “says the expert, who also anticipates that her way of working has a lot to do with learning what to do with these types of thoughts. «It is not so much how to remove them, but to give a different kind of answer. It is a therapeutic work and the objective we have at Psicontigo is to provide new tools to learn to better manage the thoughts, emotions and situations that cause you discomfort ».
Be very careful about becoming someone “complainer”
Do you have someone close to you who constantly complains about how bad is happening to them? Or are you that type of person who is talking all the time about their ailments? As the expert Patricia López Recio affirms, this can be a drain on those around us… «Someone who constantly complains, makes people move away in the end because we all like to be in rewarding situations and not constantly listen to complaints and discomforts. If this happens frequently, it does have a cost. The complaint has a function that is liberation, but once it has fulfilled the function and is continuous, it ceases to be functional and becomes an obsession».