Can a man and a woman just be friends? According to some experts, no. Sooner or later there is a risk of hearing a declaration of love. We will tell you what scenarios exist after leaving the friend zone and how to behave so as not to offend your best friend.
Reasons for the friendzone
The so-called “friend zone” is not about sincere friendship between a man and a woman. This is a swamp that is addictive, and even a declaration of love will not help you get out of it if the chosen one does not consider you as a partner for a serious relationship.
Most men subconsciously rate a young woman in terms of sex appeal. They do not look far into the future and easily give in to impulse. This pattern of behavior is due to nature. The more actively a man consumes spermatozoa, the more successful he is in terms of evolution.
If a guy offers friendship to a girl, it is likely that he has more in mind. But while he does not want to rush things, looking closely at the chosen one. Women are also sometimes guided by sexual instinct and during friendly meetings they try to get to know a man better, but quite pragmatic goals are also possible.
For example, a girl may view a friend as a “fallback”. In her dreams, she seeks to meet the “prince on a white horse”, to marry a handsome and rich man. But if such a person does not meet, a person who is always there will be suitable as a partner for creating a family.
A break up
If a loved one confesses his love, but you do not have reciprocal feelings for him, end the relationship. The offer to “remain friends” will turn into excruciating torture for both.
The guy will not be able to find his “half”, and it will be difficult for the girl to give herself to the person with whom she still decides to build a family. Erotic tension will persist during meetings, with no prospect of an exit.
Remember: relationships are not the only thing that makes us happy. It is not necessary to acquire a couple just because society requires it. Your own choice is more important. But you need to respect the other person, and if he plans to create a family, let him find a place in his heart for a new love, even through the pain of parting with you.
From friend to lover
Between a man and a woman who are connected by friendship, tender feelings can arise, and from both sides. The most courageous is recognized in love, both will breathe a sigh of relief. But relationships in this case do not always turn into serious ones and end in marriage.
Sometimes former friends can turn into just lovers. This happens if both seek only physical pleasures. A similar model of relationships often develops with daring, sexual partners who know how to excite the imagination.
A male lover is not inclined to any obligations
He just wants to have a good time. He expects the same from a woman. But the fair sex runs the risk of falling in love seriously, agreeing to the status of a mistress.
If a woman often dedicates a man to her secrets, shares her sore with him, a “friend with a benefit” turns into a person dear to her. When one day a separation or betrayal occurs, disappointment cannot be avoided.
Becoming lovers is not the best option for developing relationships after leaving the friend zone: the partners communicated too closely with each other before the start of physical contact.
Intimate life can awaken deeper feelings that were previously dormant. If one of the “former friends” does not intend to develop a serious relationship, the other will be hurt by such a scenario.
The course to create a family
The most harmonious variant of the development of relations. If a male friend is always ready to lend a “strong shoulder”, turns out to be nearby in a difficult period, then it is not dangerous to engage in romantic interaction with him.
Even if a girl does not have strong feelings for a friend, but agrees to get married, this can be a strong and harmonious family. A woman will see in her chosen one a person who can be relied upon, and her husband will surround her with care, appreciate and respect.
However, the friend zone is not the best relationship option for a man and a woman. She collapses like a house of cards as soon as one of the friends begins to feel attraction.
No matter how the scenario develops further, we must not forget about humanity and mutual understanding. If a person is not interesting to you, stop communicating and let him meet his fate.
Do not delay the decision: time is the most expensive resource that is unwise to spend on empty relationships.
Anastasia Filippova – psychologist, EMDR-therapist. Her .