Cleanliness: mistakes to avoid

Baby on the potty: yes, but not too early!

Before the age of 18 months, the child’s nervous system is not mature enough to allow him to control his sphincters. These muscles, located around the anus and the urethra, make it possible to control the opening and closing of these orifices and therefore to hold back. There is therefore no point in offering the potty too early to your baby. And although this sometimes gives results, they have to be all haphazard. To know if he is physically ready, we say that the child must be able to go up and down stairs alone, a sign that he controls these famous muscles. An unsoiled diaper during a nap is also a warning sign. But the psychological aspect is not to be neglected either. If your child is totally losing interest in potty and is not showing the urge to get rid of his diapers, it seems best to wait a little longer.

Leave the child too long on the potty

To begin with, we will have to explain to him what this new object is for. The best ? Put him away in the toilet, and show yourself there, if you don’t mind, so that he understands the function of this room. Then you can start to install it gradually, bare buttocks. Preferably choose the time that you foresee the most favorable, that is to say the one of the day when he is used to having his bowel movements.. But it is strongly advised not to leave it there for too long. Staying more than 10 minutes on the potty would be experienced by the child as a constraint, preventing him from going about more interesting occupations, and would disgust him. If, on the contrary, it is he who wishes to stay there, remind him that the pot is not a game. If he does not want to do it, no need for him to drag on.

Put it on the pot after each meal

Establishing a routine is important for the child. The rhythms help and reassure him. But having a bowel movement must remain something spontaneous, otherwise you risk depriving him of the notion of need. The child shouldn’t go on the potty because you tell him to, but because he wants to. At the beginning, vYou can install it there after meals, but don’t make it a must-have habit. The routine to be put in place should therefore rather resemble a ritual. It should not be linked to the time it is, but to the signals it sends you. Whenever you understand that he is getting ready or is doing: guide him to the pot.

Insist on the idea that the pot makes you become “big”

Contrary to what some may believe, the notion of “growing up” is not the most convincing argument for the child, especially at this age. THEis afraid of the unknown and the anxiety it generates in him could block him. Remaining a baby, a situation he is experiencing, is a reassuring temptation. So when you equate layers with this status, you might be surprised to see her suddenly become attached to it.

To congratulate him excessively

To do in the pot, it is not an exploit, it is a natural act and necessary to meet its needs. By congratulating him too much, your child might see in the potty a real stake between you. This disproportionate importance given to cleanliness provides him with leverage, at an age when his taste for opposition is already pronounced.

Dramatize failures or relapses

In the beginning, accidents are frequent and normal. As long as the potty reflex is not acquired, it will undoubtedly happen that he forgets to claim or does it a little too late. Don’t make a big deal out of it. Be patient and continue to encourage him. Remind him that you trust him and that he’ll get there eventually, at his own pace. Because even if you are stressed by the deadline for entering school, he should not feel rushed. You can explain to him that it is necessary to be clean to become a schoolboy, that motivates some, but do not put pressure on him. It is also possible that he will relapse after several days of control.. Again, don’t overdo it. Continue to support it and try to understand the cause. He was perhaps not yet ready or reacting to an upheaval in his life (birth of a youngest child, absence of a parent…).

Throw away his stool without explaining why

It is often difficult for toddlers to understand that their stools, which come out of them, are not “parts” of themselves. THEthrowing the contents of the pot in the toilet, without further explanation, can therefore be badly defeated by your child. It is important to tell him that this excrement is waste, that his body has produced and then rejected, and that it would be dangerous for him to keep them in him. You don’t need to force him to watch when you empty the jar if that seems to bother him. When he feels ready, he will know how to let it know. Many children end up loving going to the toilet on their own.