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Christmas What happens at the company dinner, does it stay at the company dinner?
Practical tips to avoid losing your papers at lunches, dinners or meetings organized by the company at Christmas
“Company dinner” … The expression itself awakens all kinds of conflicting emotions, which are not always positive. Although the usual thing is that these pre-Christmas work meetings are held by the company with the vocation of strengthen ties between teams or as an excuse to celebrate some achievement or the fulfillment of objectives, the truth is that, as explained by José Miguel Sánchez, a «motivational speaker» specialized in work psychology, some companies may use these events to give announcements, calls for attention or even reproach something that has gone wrong.
This type of action is a mistake, according to the expert, because in reality corporate lunches or dinners can be a great opportunity to celebrate what has been achieved during the year in a context that is ideal. On these dates, many people connect with their spirituality, reunite with family and friends and let the caring and empathetic human being within them emerge. That is why the expert recommends taking advantage of these meetings to rejoice in the effort made and enjoy fun and pleasant moments with colleagues outside of the usual environment.
Five things you should never do
Once the meaning of this type of meeting has been clarified and when we have already decided to enjoy it, instead of complaining or predicting that it will be something tedious, it is important to be clear that this type of event is not a meeting of friends, not a wild party. In fact, for José Miguel Sánchez, there are five things that should always be avoided in these work meetings:
Lose the papers. It seems obvious, but because this maxim is not clear, it is not easily avoided. Knowing what your role is in the company and what are the links or relationships that you have worked with during the rest of the year will help you maintain an appropriate attitude in an environment that, although it is celebrated in another context, is still work.
Abusing alcohol. “There is nothing you like less than seeing a person you work with drink drink,” says Sánchez, which especially affects the case of some people who also know that drinking alcohol is not usually good for them.
Badmouth peers. Taking advantage of this more relaxed environment to criticize behind the back causes rejection and distrust.
False appearances in front of bosses. “Selling” yourself excessively to team leaders by taking advantage of a relaxed environment tends to work against you, according to the expert.
Deal with political or religious issues. This maxim, which is also usually applied as a recommendation to avoid conflicts in family gatherings, is equally valid at company dinners. “Remember that it is a time to enjoy and that it is not worth generating conflicts that may later become a label against you,” clarifies José Miguel Sánchez.
Guidelines for a successful encounter
Assuming that the objective of these meetings is to share relaxed moments with those people with whom we spend many hours a day, the job coach explains that some attitudes and behaviors can contribute to a successful meeting.
Being yourself and trying not to play a role is one of the keys, although it is also important to have the ability to have a pleasant conversation with colleagues about trivial topics that have nothing to do with the day-to-day life of the company or issues deeper (remember avoiding politics and religion).
It will also be useful in these events to take the opportunity to chat with those people with whom we do not usually have contact. This will help, according to the expert, to create a internal network of contacts that allows in the future to resolve conflicts or face challenges from a greater knowledge and trust with colleagues from other departments with whom one does not usually work. “If at specific times I have joint projects with these people, these calmer conversations that usually take place at Christmas dinner will make it possible for us to work with them later without having to dedicate time to initiate or build the relationship,” explains Sánchez.
And the last guideline is the most important: celebrate. “You have to take advantage of it to generate serotonin, oxytocin and endorphins through the enjoyment of conversation, good food and the company of others at such a special time of year,” he says.
What do I do if a colleague loses their papers?
Although we are not responsible for the actions of other colleagues, showing solidarity with a person we appreciate in one of his moments of weakness is an enriching behavior, according to José Miguel Sánchez. Therefore, his recommendation in these cases is to try to help him, take him away from the place of the celebration in a discreet way and, if he is in bad condition, accompany him until he goes away.
Another situation that can occur in this context is to check that some colleague tries to damage our image or in front of other colleagues or even in front of the bosses. In this case, the expert advises facing it directly, especially if we are witnessing it. “What we should never do is avoid conflict and let it be because it will come up again later. If we allow it and do not defend ourselves against such comments to avoid conflict, the consequences may be worse in the future. Being assertive is the best thing in this situation, ”he argues.
The way to act in this case is to tell that person not to follow that path. «Both the tone of voice and the gestures must be clear. We must not be aggressive, but that colleague who has criticized us does not have to see an iota of doubt or insecurity in our communication, ”says Sánchez. In addition, the arguments against what that person is saying must also be solid, so that those who are listening to the discussion are clear about our position in the face of the conflict created by the partner.
Finally, the expert advises to speak later alone with that person to prevent future conflicts by asking respect and good manners, and agreeing on a way to solve problems that is satisfactory to both of you.