Children: psychologist’s advice for stress-free meals

Marion, mother of Albertine and Louise: “My daughter always finds that she is served less dessert than her sister! “

>> Answer from the shrink:Children imagine the love their parents have for them as a big cake of which everyone wants the biggest slice! And food is love, so everyone wants more of everything on their plate! In the event of a crisis of jealousy, no need to try to give exactly the same to everyone, to count the number of fries, it is useless, because in any case, the jealous will always have the impression of being wronged. On the contrary, differentiate and serve each according to their preferences and hunger. Say, “You took more meat because you like it, and your sister takes more cream because she likes it!” “

Sylvain, Sarah’s dad: “She always wants to eat the same thing! “

>> Answer from the shrink: She only wants to eat shellfish / ham and fruit yogurt? She refuses all vegetables, fruits, fish? Continue to offer him everything. Don’t give in: keep serving vegetables at every meal. Do not try to disguise them, keep it simple and always presented the same, because it needs time to tame each dish. Explain to her that she is grown up now and that she is entitled to the parents’ menu. Shop and cook various flavors with it.

Audrey, Raphaël’s mother: “He eats everything from other people… and is difficult at home! “

>> Answer from the shrink : Your smart little one understands how much food is invested emotionally by his mother, because it represents a proof of love. Refusing food is a good way to push yourself to the limit, but also to assert yourself and claim your autonomy. When your child sulks his plate, don’t question yourself, don’t beat yourself up. Don’t be anxious because you will communicate your stress to him. Do not force it especially because you will create a blockage. Make it easier to be lighter, have confidence in your ability to be a good mother, and don’t push it. This will allow him to find other ways to express his desire for autonomy. And since he eats better with others, do not hesitate to pass the baton on to those around him at mealtime.

Louis, Basile’s dad: “My son wants to ‘have fun’ while eating! “

>> Answer from the shrink: If your little one has a tendency to abandon the spoon to eat with his fingers, let him patrol his plate. If you deny him this “food-pleasure” step, and force him to eat properly too soon, he will express his displeasure by turning the meals into a showdown. Let him play while eating, he is awakening his 5 senses: taste, smell, touch, sight and hearing! Wait until she is 3 years old to ask her to hold her fork well and not to get it all over the place.

Nour, Kenza’s mother: “She nibbles all day and doesn’t eat anything at the table! “

>> Answer from the shrink: Snacking is a hell of a temptation from the age when you start to open cupboards on your own. Be careful not to encourage him. Do not use the “dressing candy” systematically given to a sad or bored child. If she quibbles at the table, just tell her: “You’re not hungry anymore, ok, you get out of the table, you’ll eat better tonight at dinner.” ” End of the story. Do not offer her a maxi-snack two hours later, under the pretext that she did not eat anything for lunch. Knowing how to be firm is necessary.