Children and household chores: is it necessary to divide housework into male and female

The child learns to perceive the surrounding reality by looking at mom and dad. Copies the behavior patterns of parents and applies them in “his” environment – on the playground, at school, visiting friends. Therefore, do not be surprised if the son refuses to help with the preparation of the salad with the words: “I’m a boy!”

Instead of forcing your child to cut cucumbers and onions, think about why he became a hostage to stereotypes. According to research¹, women do most of the household chores. The girls who took part in the survey said that they are responsible for cleaning, cooking, washing dishes and laundry. And the men take out the garbage, fix the car and mow the lawn. It’s hard to believe, but 10% of compatriots do all their homework alone. Why it happens?

Originally from childhood

Initially, the child does not know what duties are imposed on him by belonging to the male or female sex, but adults from birth make him understand this. Boys are shamed for tears, and girls for a stain on their dress. Let’s figure out what phrases should be avoided so as not to drive the child into unnecessary frames.

1. Girls cook/clean better

It is believed that cleanliness in the apartment and a delicious dinner are the responsibility of a woman, because everyone should do what he does best. The degree of accuracy in cooking is not spelled out in the boy’s genetic code. And girls are not born with the skill to wipe the dust or cook borscht. As practice shows, men make excellent cooks. In any restaurant you can meet a representative of the stronger sex, who easily prepares a juicy steak, creates desserts and bakes a delicious biscuit. Boys can be just as good as girls at vacuuming, tending houseplants, and cutting salads.

2. You need to raise a good housewife in your daughter, a purposeful careerist in your son

We often come across the stereotype that a boy should not cry and show emotions, he needs to develop his mind in order to earn money and build a career. And the girl must be prepared for future marriage. In fact, every child needs all-round development. If parents raise the baby in accordance with the “purpose”, then he will not learn to be free from gender stereotypes.

3. Boys are not interested in housework.

A baby begins to explore the world from birth. Everything that surrounds him becomes an object for research: people, toys, animals, interior items. Curiosity is an essential trait of any child. It is very important to help the baby in the development of a new business and not limit his curiosity. The task of parents is to introduce children to different areas of life. Boys may be equally interested in helping mom and dad with cleaning or cooking. The main thing is to find a way to captivate the child.

Everything is in plus

Because of the fear of making a mistake, we do not notice the opportunities that life provides us. Rejection of stereotypes will allow the baby not to be ashamed of himself and his preferences. By raising a child outside of existing clichés, parents help him see a new, bright world. Consider the benefits of this gender-neutral approach.

1. The child will grow up confident and will not be afraid of new challenges

Self-confidence is one of the greatest gifts parents can give to children. An insecure child will be less willing to try new things and take on challenging tasks. This kind of behavior will get in the way of success.

2. The child will learn to build relationships with a partner in adulthood

The attitude of the child to household chores depends on the parents. According to the survey, 77% of respondents are grateful to their spouse’s parents for the good preparation of their partner for family life. The future daughter-in-law will definitely thank her mother-in-law for teaching her son to keep the apartment clean, cook delicious mashed potatoes and take care of the flowers. And the son-in-law will be grateful to the mother-in-law for a self-confident wife.

3. The child will be able to do what he really loves.

Stereotypes get in the way of doing what you like. For example, a boy cooks delicious sandwiches, creates unusual salads, and tries to help his mother with more complex dishes. And the girl is interested in how electrical appliances work. She likes to watch how easy dad can fix a computer problem or how quickly he can fix the refrigerator. But social stereotypes make a child doubt if his desires do not correspond to gender rules. Be attentive to the interests of the baby, let him do what he really wants.

A new look at household chores

It is in our power to protect children from the influence of outdated and harmful stereotypes, to give them a new, clear and broad view of life, family and themselves. You just need to follow the recommendations below, and then in the future the child will not have problems hanging a shelf for her husband or ironing a dress for her wife.

1. Set an example

We are a reflection of our parents. The child copies the attitude of mom and dad to household chores. If children see that cleaning, washing are common tasks, they remember that this is the norm. Share household chores with your spouse. The kid will watch how his mom and dad distribute work, and learn the right attitude to household chores. The stereotype “a man should hammer in nails, and a woman should cook borscht” is long gone. Help your child see this for themselves.

2. Do not share homework between a boy and a girl

Any work is distributed among people who are able to perform it and have an interest in it. It’s not gender related. Knowing how to handle a hammer is an extremely useful skill that everyone can use. As well as the ability to cook breakfast or sew on a button. Let children, not traditions and stereotypes, decide what their life will be like.

3. Have family dinners

Cooking dinner together on Sundays or spring cleaning on Saturdays will help you get closer. When a son happily cuts apples for a pie, dad kneads the dough, daughter washes berries, and mom mixes syrup, no one will think that “cooking is only a woman’s business.” Everyone in the family will feel loved and will definitely look forward to this day.

¹ Home appliance brand Indesit conducted an international study as part of the #BetterTogether social campaign and found out how families feel about the unequal distribution of household responsibilities. The study interviewed 4000 respondents in Russia, Great Britain and France. The online survey was conducted from April 27 to May 8, 2019.