Our reader decided on the first child, being at a fairly mature age. And she told me what way she went – from choosing a doctor to the first cry of a baby. It turned out a rather detailed instruction, which we bring to your attention.
My name is Alisa Razuvaeva, I am 38 years old. They say this is not the best age for the first birth. Of course, now women decide on their first child and in their fifths, but this is more of an experiment on health. Of course, I knew this, but I was sincerely sure that pregnancy and childbirth would not be a problem for me. I never complained about my health, it was just that somehow … it didn’t work.
But what I got right away was the label “elderly primiparous”, which was stuck to me in the antenatal clinic.
“38? – and a puzzled look from under the glasses. – It’s too late for you, my dear, to think, now you won’t end up with problems.
I didn’t like this attitude. Who would like it? As if I really wanted to give birth to my grandson. My husband and I thought about it and decided to go to give birth abroad: there doctors have more experience in giving birth to women over 35, and the approach to patients is qualitatively different. It was only a matter of money, but we decided to strain on such a thing, but to make money.
The first thing I thought about was where to go. There are legends about childbirth in Japan, England, Israel, the USA … As a result, I came across the MedEssentially service, left an application. The next day I was offered a choice of three countries: Israel, Germany, Great Britain. Everything was simple here. It seemed to me too hot in Israel, and when you are in a position, this is a significant factor, in Germany they speak German, which I do not know, and English for me is a working language. I decided to give birth in London.
In the UK, doctors tend to be in private practice, but they are associated with a specific clinic. If any serious research or surgery is needed, they refer their patients there. I chose a doctor who practices at Chelsea and Westminster Hospital.
You could also choose a private obstetric clinic, there is more gloss. But then I read that Kate Middleton herself gave birth to a little prince in a public hospital. In addition, in case of any complication in a private clinic, the pregnant woman will still be taken to a general hospital, where there is a private and public department. So what’s the point of going by ambulance through the whole city, if you can stop at a large medical center from the very beginning, where, if something happens, you will simply be transported from one floor to another?
We immediately signed an agreement for the entire package: pregnancy, childbirth and the postpartum period, and I made a deposit in the amount of half of the total cost, and the second part after the birth. The system is as follows: the doctor’s services are paid separately (pregnancy management, childbirth and postnatal observation for several weeks). It will cost 8-10 thousand pounds. And after giving birth, you pay separately to the hospital for the infrastructure that was provided to you: an anesthesiologist, postnatal ward, childbirth by cesarean section or natural. All tests during pregnancy and after childbirth are also paid separately. You get the bill when you are discharged with your child.
To give birth in England, you need a medical visa, which is issued for six months. The documents you will need are the following.
1. A certificate from a British doctor about what medical services will be provided to me. My doctor emailed me one like this.
2. Certificate that I really have money to pay for medical services. They calculate the money according to the unspoken formula: the cost of the service plus another thousand pounds. I received the certificate from my bank, it differs slightly from the standard statement. Just in case, I attached a document stating that I had already paid half of the cost of the services. Such precautions are taken so that a potential patient of a British doctor does not start looking for a job there.
3. Proof of close ties with the homeland. Real estate, for example, is good. The receiving party wanted to be sure that I had something to lose, otherwise I would suddenly decide to stay and start begging for benefits.
4. All other documents are the same as when applying for a tourist visa.
It is supposed to arrive at the first consultation within 8-9 weeks. On the first appointment, the doctor’s assistant calculated the PDR so that it would not occur during the vacation of my gynecologist.
So, I flew to London for the first time. Everything went as it should. By the way, my age did not cause any bewilderment to the doctor. He didn’t even raise an eyebrow. The next meeting was scheduled for the 12th week. I had to undergo an ultrasound scan and tests. Then I had to come to the consultation every 4-6 weeks, take various tests, take tests. From the second trimester, I started to have an ultrasound of the cervix to check the dilation.
In the first two terms, I flew to London three times. In the 30th week, she already stayed in England. Otherwise, there could be difficulties during flights: they may not be allowed to board the plane, and the declaration of health will have to be submitted at the airport.
Remaining in London, she began to go to the doctor, as if to work, once a week. Standard tests, measure blood pressure, made an echocardiogram of the child’s heart.
I was finally able to see enough of all the sights of the capital of England. Without haste – there was nowhere to rush, and with a stomach and not accelerate. I must say, everything is fine with the toilets there, for which I would like to thank you separately. Otherwise, I would have walked 15 minutes from the hotel.
In England, you can agree on a caesarean: if you have such a desire, they will meet you halfway. That is, it is not necessary that there are medical indications for the operation, your will is enough. Caesarean will be done on the appointed day, and you don’t even need to go to bed in advance – you just come in the morning, and in three hours you are already a mother. On the third day after the operation, they are discharged if there are no complications.
It is the same with natural childbirth: you give birth on the day of admission to the clinic. Moreover, after the usual successful childbirth, you can be discharged in 6 hours! Many were surprised by the appearance of Kate Middleton with the newborn prince in front of the cameras just a few hours after his birth. No wonder, this is the way it is in Great Britain. Turns out.
And here it is, hour x. In the evening I felt that something was happening. I called the doctor. He ordered to measure the time between contractions. He told me to get ready in the morning and go to the clinic. And if they become too frequent, then at night. However, I also managed to sleep.
In the ward I was alone, except for the midwife, who did not leave me at all. She told me how to breathe, what to do. Shout out? Leave me alone? Come on, this is not accepted here. It was easier for me to endure contractions on my legs, so she walked next to me along the wall, supported my arm, gave me a drink. And all the time she wrote something down.
Later, when my baby and I were discharged, they explained to me why this was being done. It turned out in case of possible complications. Physicians record literally every step, every nuance. Records may be needed if the child has any health problems. It will be possible to assess the correctness of the actions of the personnel and to understand the source of the problems. The records are kept for 18 years.
The birth went off without a hitch, without a hitch. For a long time, of course, these 16 hours in the clinic seemed like an eternity. But mothers will understand me – having heard the first cry of my baby, I completely forgot about my torment.
Even before Olenka was born, a neonatologist appeared in the ward. He literally watched – children are supposed to be examined here in the very first seconds of life. If something goes wrong, they will be taken to the intensive care unit for babies.
On the first day, the baby is watched. Olenka was tested for sugar, her physical development and hearing were assessed. Everything was fine, so we were left together in the ward. They also offered to call my husband, there was a folding bed for him. I did not take advantage of this opportunity, but I was more the exception than the rule. In 90 percent of cases, the father is present at childbirth.
Baby with me, we were discharged, everything is fine. I just flew with happiness. But I flew around London – it was still early home. There were still three visits to the doctor, once every two weeks. First, they did an ultrasound scan, checked how the uterus was contracting, and assessed the hormonal background. After another two, the doctor suggested putting a spiral if I do not plan to give birth in the near future. I didn’t plan, but I gave up on the spiral. After six weeks, I finally came to my senses. I was even allowed to play a little sports.
By the way, the doctor was not at all surprised that I quickly recovered. Said it was okay. If a woman cares about her health, then childbirth, even at this age, will not knock her down, even the first ones. To tell the truth, I even felt some gloating – the bugs from my district consultation would wipe out.
I will not say that everything was very simple and smooth. But my doctor was on call 24 hours a day while I was in England. And yes, I called: it seemed to me that Olenka eats little, then somehow suspiciously sniffs. Each time the doctor answered me, calmed me down, explained. And it was a great happiness, because motherhood for me is something completely new.
Now my baby is already six months old. My husband and I are thinking about the second child. And you can be sure, and the second time I will give birth in England.