Balanced Parenting
Many parents, even before they had a child, thought about how best to raise him, develop his abilities, in other words, make him happy.
But now a child is born and, as often happens, he is faced with the fact that he cannot justify parental expectations. The vector of family attention shifts from the child himself, with all his features, to his shortcomings. The kid is rarely praised, mostly they point out his mistakes, they are ashamed, forgetting that a child is always a combination of a wide variety of qualities and unique abilities that, without due attention, may remain unrealized.
It is important for parents to understand that every child has strengths and weaknesses. For example, a child can be very smart, but at the same time lazy. Thus, he begins to very cleverly skip school or dodge household duties, at the risk of being branded as an ordinary lazy person. At the same time, its positive manifestation is completely ignored, such as, for example, the logical argumentation of one’s own position, even if it is reflected in the refusal to wash the floor at home or do homework in English.
What is the most important thing to focus on when educating?
The very first thing a parent really needs to do is build security system. This is a state in which the child can live quietly, enjoying life, without harming himself or others. For example, you can and should allow an active child to kick a ball in the yard, but forbid it on the roadway. Simply put, a parent must define the boundaries of their child’s behavior.
It is very important to understand that if the negative manifestations of the child threaten him and those around him, then you need, first of all, to correct them. The child must be formed so that he easily fits into social norms. For example, a very active baby can and should be sent to the sports section, but before that, it is imperative to limit the circle of his activity, for example, if he needs to splash out his emotions, but this is permissible in sports, but not in the classroom during the lesson.
Further, the parent will already determine the child’s inclinations for a particular occupation, namely, he turns his attention to his resources and abilities. If a child is clearly interested in the process of cooking, then it will not be superfluous to send him to courses for young culinary specialists. But, it must be remembered that the development of a child’s positive inclinations should occur only after adjusting his social behavior. Here is an example from adulthood. Suppose a woman meets a man, he is kind, sympathetic, makes excellent money, but he has a mental disorder. Once a week, he has an outburst of rage, and in a fit he can easily cripple or even kill his chosen one. Is it worth it to start a family with him, even considering all his positive qualities? The answer is unequivocal — no. Likewise with a child. First of all, there should be a study of those qualities that can interfere with his adaptation in society and threaten his own health.
Further development of the child
Suppose a child already feels great in society and society is not threatened. Now the parent is faced with the task of whether to focus specifically on the abilities and inclinations of the child, or whether it is worth developing him comprehensively, without a clear emphasis on one or another of his qualities. A good, but lazy parent will choose an easier path and, for example, send the same child with the makings of a culinary specialist to a culinary school, and will not develop his mathematical abilities, which, perhaps, are not so pronounced, they say, what to do is not given!
In fact, it is worth developing absolutely everything if possible. Probably, the child will not become a great cook and an outstanding mathematician at the same time, but he needs basic counting and logic skills. Just like a young swimmer, it is not at all necessary to become a boxer, but being able to protect yourself will also not be superfluous.
It is important to remember that by raising a child and developing one or another of his qualities, we make an important, even invaluable contribution to his future, to how he can fulfill himself in life on his own, so you need to give him a chance to show himself as much as possible, because there is not a single skill, which, once developed, will not be useful to the child in the future.