The Eksmo Publishing House publishes a series for all times called “Chicken Soup for the Soul”. It is a collection of motivating stories from people about love and happiness. We are publishing one story about the happiness of becoming a parent from the book “Chicken Soup for the Soul: 101 Stories of Happiness.”
My family had no equal in quarrels. Mom was a furious, hot-tempered and stubborn woman who always stood her ground. When I was five years old, she left my father in Hong Kong and came with me to the United States to start a new life. My stepfather went through such an emotional trauma as a child that he lied about his age and ran away from his family to the navy. He drowned his pain in an alcoholic sea. Since childhood, I have watched them periodically knock each other down, against the background of their quarrels, Ali-Fraser’s fights looked like prim tea parties.
My family showed that I shouldn’t have children – I had no idea how to raise them. Desperate mother and stepfather hurt each other, and the thought that I could behave the same way with my children scared the hell out of me. Deep down, I was afraid that I would fail the most important role in human life: raising a child.
My wife Kuyen and I got married two years after we met. I always told her that I didn’t want to be a father, and she didn’t try to convince me. But I did not understand her desire to become a mother. She was originally from Vietnam and went through the horrors of war. Her family lost their home, the restaurant where they worked, and all their property was taken away by the communists. They have nothing left.
Kuyen had eight brothers and sisters, and she helped take care of them. She really liked it. She dreamed of coming to America and creating her own family, raising her own children. But, knowing my attitude towards children, she still married me. The thought made me feel unbearable sadness.
I remember the day my life changed. We came to a friend’s party. Among the guests was a couple with a baby. When my wife saw him, she shone like an angel on top of a Christmas tree. She asked to hold the baby and gently began to rock him, an expression of genuine happiness was written on her face, which brought her a lump of life, tossing and turning in her arms.
The child’s parents went off to chat with other guests, and I watched Kuyen in amazement: how she sang lullabies, how the saliva on the lips of the child was soaked. When the baby cried, my wife fed him from a bottle and patted him on the back to make him vomit. I watched her rock the child, as, falling asleep, he settled on her shoulder, like a kitten on the belly of a mother cat. Kuyen was delighted!
That evening I decided to become a father. I doubted that my upbringing would work out, but I knew that Kuyen would be able to correct my mistakes. When we got home from the party, I said all this to my wife, and her face lit up brighter than that of a child entering Disneyland for the first time. She hugged me and sobbed, shedding tears that come from the very depths of her soul when something really important happens. After a while, Kuyen took my hands, and her very touch seemed to be full of meaning. Then she looked at me with a smile. The confidence in her eyes told me everything before the words sounded:
– You will be a wonderful father, Ray.
Today we have Kevin, XNUMX, and Christie, XNUMX.
Cuyenne and I love Dancing With Wolves, so we named our son after Kevin Costner. The daughter is named after the graceful figure skater Kristi Yamaguchi.
Kevin can play Nintendo DS Lite, Wii, or any other video game for hours. Kuyen and I had to set strict rules, otherwise he would have been playing around the clock. He is a chatterbox and cannot stop talking. His favorite food is Kirkland semi-finished macaroni and cheese. He’s so sensitive that he sheds tears when his Hawaii cousin leaves after staying with us for a week.
One day Cuyenne and I were discussing at the table what we dreamed of when we were young, and I asked Kevin what he wants to be when he grows up. My son did not think long, and then innocently declared:
– I want to be a free person. Then I can sit at home and play with the children all the time.
Christie snuggles up to me as I read her children’s books. She is indignant if I do not tell her a bedtime story. She teases by pretending to fall asleep in the car as we drive home from Costco. Her favorite food is microwave chicken nuggets. When I am sad, she feels it and comes to sit with me. My sadness disappears immediately.
Christie asked me last week:
– Daddy, there is Mother’s Day and Father’s Day, why not Children’s Day?
If I say that children are the whole world for me, then I will greatly underestimate my feelings. Simply put, they give my life a purpose, and every day I thank Heaven for two of the finest gifts a man, a father, can have.
Ray M. Wong