Language is not only the most important tool for interacting with other people, but also a way of self-knowledge. The way we speak and write can tell a lot about ourselves. As a man lives, so he speaks. Bibliotherapist Tatyana Koloshina explains how to get rid of negative states with the help of syncwines, horror stories and magic words.
Language is a very living form that responds to any changes. Through it, you can both understand yourself and others, and influence your own state. It is on this that the direction of art therapy is based — bibliotherapy (from the Latin word biblio — “book”). And the second basic brick in the foundation of this area of psychotherapy is Henneken’s law. According to him, the main character of any work is always the author himself.
“He can show his whole self. Or write about one part of yourself: the best, the worst, the sick, the suffering. If you carefully analyze several works of one author, you can describe the structure of the character and personality of the writer,” art therapist Tatyana Koloshina said at an open lecture. “When people compose something, write poetry, text, they write about themselves and give themselves away.”
And this property can be used both by a psychologist in working with clients, and by anyone who wants to know their condition and correct it. Often, however, you can hear: they say, I can’t compose, I can’t. Uncreative people, Tatyana Koloshina is convinced, do not exist. Otherwise, we would not have survived. “It’s just that someone’s creativity is in a coma, someone is in a lethargic dream. When you take her out of there, wake her up from sleep, the person’s feeling that “I can” is very strong.”
Sinkwine allows you to instantly decode the state that a person wants to get rid of
The word is the second signaling system, the art therapist explains. Change speech, change life. This is the basis of bibliotherapy techniques.
“Every person has conditions in which he constantly falls, but wants to stop it. Someone is quick-tempered, someone is jealous, someone is touchy. What conditions are undesirable? Almost the entire aggressive and negative series: irritation, fear, longing, resentment, anxiety, guilt, anger. This is something that is unpleasant to experience, which society forbids to express, offering two options: sublimate (you can’t yell at the boss, then I will be discharged at home) or displace (then unexpressed anger or resentment can go into psychosomatics).
And if we want to get out of the habitual pattern, to cope with strong emotions or, conversely, to give them free rein, we can apply several techniques. The main thing is to follow the scheme when writing your “literary work”.
Sinkwine
Follow the algorithm for writing psychological syncwine. Such a scheme is an eleven word book. Prepositions and conjunctions do not count as words. There should be five lines in total.
First line: the name of the state is one word.
Second line: state metaphor — two words.
Third line: what actions I usually perform automatically, out of habit, once in this state — three words.
Fourth line: the feelings that arise as a result of these habitual actions are four words.
Fifth line: the name of the state is one word.
“It turns out a kind of rondo: where we started, we’ll return to that,” explains Tatyana Koloshina. But often the last line is different from the first. That is, something happened to our state in five lines. What else is good about this technique: what people talk about, what they mean by a word, for example, “longing,” God alone knows. Sinkwine allows you to make an instant decoding of the state that a person wants to get rid of, as soon as he begins to describe feelings, actions. There is nothing about thoughts here — the mind at this moment is busy clearly denoting the state in words.
Tatyana Koloshina gives examples of snickwains that helped to recognize depression in a client.
Example 1.
«Depression.
Viscous fog.
I lie huddled in a ball.
Despair, impotence, fear and emptiness.
Depression»
“As you can see, there were no changes from the first to the fifth lines, we have not worked with the client yet.”
Example 2.
«Depression.
No time.
I lie down with my eyes closed.
And empty, empty, empty, empty.
Depression»
“This is clearly clinical depression, and it is unlikely to do without drugs,” Tatyana Koloshina comments.
Here is an example of an easier, but also unpleasant state, which can be changed with the help of a literary work.
«It’s an insult.
Vile impotence.
Swallowing swearing, I don’t look
Anger, disgust, fear, impotence.
Despondency»
“Now you can work with despondency and write a new cinquain. And so you can get a whole wreath of syncwines. You don’t have to end up positive, no. But the state will change, it will be with a different degree and intensity. As if a person lay motionless for an hour, and then forced himself to get up by an effort of will. And his condition immediately changed to another, more preferable one. This is not joy, no, but a person will no longer run in circles like a driven horse, ”explains the art therapist.
Horror stories
Writing horror stories is no less effective resource tool. We have known them since childhood. «Children in the basement played the Gestapo, the plumber Potapov died of torture.» It is clear that this is hyperbole and in reality the children did not do this.
“Horror stories are an allegorical, approved expression of anger, a socially accepted form. Someone irritates or becomes a constant source of troubles and unpleasant emotions. The task of the horror story is to deal with him in a rhyme in the most witty and sadistic way, to throw out the pent-up emotions on paper. One day, the participants of the seminar offered me the following horror story: “The huge department was having fun all day — a dead boss was hanging on a branch.” Believe me: if some person annoyed you or caused harm, then after such 3-4 rhymes, when you meet him, you will no longer be angry, but laugh.
Haiku
“Once Nifont Dolgopolov invited me to a Gestalt conference. I clarified what the topic was on the last day of work. It turned out the theme of skeletons. And I invited the participants to compose haiku on this topic — Japanese three-verses. We laughed our heads off. Awesome discharge.
«Fell in love.
Came.
The skeleton of last year’s beloved fell out of the closet.
***
“I will open the wardrobe at night.
It resounds in it, it smells of bones.
Mosaic of Passion.
***
«In the winter evening
nice in the closet
sort out the bones of the skeleton.
***
«Time flies
I don’t remember half of the skeletons
And for some reason I keep it.
***
«Skeleton in the closet.
Gently dust them off.
Someone has mine.»
***
«Where are you, my love?
Your skeleton is missing from the closet.
effect of therapy.
***
«I am proud of myself,
taking skeletons out of the closet
Life is not wasted.»
The topic is touchy and disturbing. Everyone has skeletons in their closet. And many are afraid that one day the secret will become clear. “So, in three lines, the character of a person is manifested. People cannot be afraid and laugh at the same time. Hence the effect of horror stories, including in the form of haiku. It seems that I invent horror, but I release my anger, especially when I can’t do anything with it, ”says Tatyana Koloshina.
Zen Buddhism to the rescue
There is a simple but very effective technique from Zen Buddhism to help reduce strong feelings that we find difficult to experience. “For example, anger. If it is restrained, it is psychosomatic. If you sublimate — you can’t yell at the boss, but you can at the children — then a feeling of guilt arises and it’s not a fact that this is better than anger. What can be done? Learn to say it out loud. You need to ask yourself three questions,” recommends an art therapist.
1 Question: What am I experiencing now?
Answer 1: I feel angry now.
Having said this, we find that anger has decreased by a third. Part of the energy we spent on pronunciation and verbalization. Moreover, it is important to speak in the first person — I. If you say that this and that infuriates me, there will be no effect. «I’m mad.»
2 Question: What motivated this anger?
This is a brilliant question, says Tatiana Koloshina. “In order for an emotion to arise, a stimulus must come from the external environment, or I launch this stimulus myself. We often say: this person annoys me. That doesn’t happen. The whole person cannot irritate us. Can — intonation, gestures, facial expressions. If you answer the second question, then only a third of the original feeling will remain. Or there will be nothing left. But if there is something left, then you can ask yourself a third question.
3 Question: What can I do about this anger right now?
Answer 3: I’ll put it off for an hour.
“It works flawlessly,” the art therapist assures.
Two magic words
“I often hear from clients: “I can’t do anything. Any undertakings fly by. Nobody respects me.» Etc. What do we see? That a person lives in the passive voice. He will not change anything in life until he exchanges it for a valid pledge. For example: I do not evoke feelings of love in others. And then the next question is: how and what do I do such that this happens? — says Tatyana Koloshina.
There are two magic words in life, the librarian is convinced, but we forget to use them: “bye” and “try.” We say: «I can’t write poetry.» It is enough to add: “I still can’t write poetry,” and the tone and energy of the phrase changes. «I can not do it». «And you try!».
“We often refuse something without even trying it. Our culture has it. Therefore, these two magic words are key for us,” summarizes Tatyana Koloshina.