The film «The meeting place cannot be changed»
Demonstrativeness of Manka Bonds is a consequence not of her psychological problems, but of her upbringing. This is more erroneous rather than problematic behavior.
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The following reasons usually lie behind the erroneous (conflict, inadequate, ineffective) behavior of a psychologically healthy person (and child):
- Accident. I accidentally misunderstood the situation, accidentally misunderstood other people, accidentally got distracted … You can skip a random mistake and smile, if a person is upset — support.
- physical problems. Fatigue, feeling unwell…
- Incompetence, lack of necessary knowledge and skills. People often behave conflictingly or inappropriately simply because they do not know how to behave correctly and effectively. We respond to incompetence, to mistakes out of ignorance with training. Learn to behave adequately — there will be no mistakes. See →
- Bad manners, lack of necessary habits. The way a child is raised is the way he behaves. What to do with it? Here it is more about getting interested and instilling habits: this is a long, but necessary business.
- environment provocations. If a professional «divorces» you into a conflict, not everyone can resist. And when you consider that many people provoke others even without a conscious intention, since this is their natural communication style, this cause of conflict behavior is not so rare. What to do? Strengthen your well-mannered style of communication, and be proactive, leading your own line, setting your own topics and drawing people into your style of communication.
- Psychological problems. Here we turn to the reasons for the erroneous behavior of a psychologically problematic child, or, more simply, to the reasons for problematic behavior. According to Dreikurs, there are only four typical reasons behind the erroneous behavior of a psychologically problematic child: avoiding failure, attracting attention, struggle for power and revenge. See →