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A tool for reassurance
“It is an excellent tool that helps children to manage many situations: separation from parents, grief, difficulty falling asleep …”, specifies the specialist. “Not all children need it. Some people suck their sleeping bag, their hand or get used to other rituals and this is very good. I am against the idea of wanting to impose it on the child, ”she continues. The ideal? Offer a blanket (always the same) by placing it in the bed, the deckchair, the stroller and let the baby grab it if he wishes. “This often happens around 8-9 months and the first separation anxiety,” says the expert.
A play buddy
The psychologist insists on the importance of the type of blanket to offer: “I clearly prefer the plush which represents a character or an animal to the diaper. Because the plush allows the child to chat with, to make him a companion in his daily life (bath, meal, sleep, travel). “. For the blanket to fulfill its function, it is preferable that it be unique (we bring it and bring it back from the nursery …), even if some children get used to it.
have two separate ones.
The opportunity to face loss
Parents who think about it can buy the blanket in duplicate, but Mathilde Bouychou thinks that the loss or inadvertent forgetting of a blanket is an opportunity for the child to learn to deal with the feeling of loss. “In this situation, it is important that the parents remain Zen themselves and show that you can overcome your pain with another soft toy, a hug …”, adds the shrink.
Learn to let go
This withered, sometimes torn, often dirty, blanket can bother perfectionist parents. However, it is this aspect and this smell that reassure the child. “It’s an exercise in letting go for adults!
In addition, the blanket helps children to make their immunity… ”, admits Mathilde Bouychou. We can obviously wash it from time to time by associating the child so that he accepts better this absence of a few hours and this strange scent of lavender …
The blanket is a transitional object defined in the 50s by Donald Winicott, American pediatrician.
Learning to separate
This blanket, which will have allowed the child to separate from his parents, over time becomes the object of learning to separate. “It is done in stages. We start by telling the child to leave his blanket at certain times, while playing a game, eating, etc. », Suggests the therapist. Around 3 years old, the child generally agrees to leave his blanket in his bed and finds it for rest periods (or really in case of great grief).