Bullying at school: how to deal, tips, video compilation

😉 Greetings to regular and new readers! In the article “Bullying at school: how to fight” about the signs, causes and consequences of this social phenomenon.

What is bullying

Habitual phenomena are now increasingly called foreign terms. And today the usual bullying is often called “bullying” (bullying, from the English bully – a bully, a bully).

Regardless of the name, we are talking about harassment, oppression, discrimination, physical or psychological torture, aggressive persecution, deliberate cruel treatment.

Bullying is common all over the world. It is inherent in closed groups in schools, orphanages, boarding schools, prisons, and the army. This shameful social phenomenon is an echo of the harsh laws of the animal world.

In flocks, they always killed, destroyed, at best, they simply drove out strangers who were not similar to others, physically weaker, with developmental disabilities. This was due to the struggle for survival.

Timely destruction of questionable individuals guaranteed the safety of the entire flock. Weak animals got sick, spread infections, spoiled the gene pool. There was a natural (in essence extremely cruel) selection – only viable, standard, strong members of the “animal collective” survived.

But we are human beings and we have no right to give vent to our animal instincts. We must guarantee the right to life, safety and psychological comfort for our children, whatever they may be.

Why bullying is dangerous

This topic is of particular relevance in the context of the development of inclusive education. From the English. inclusive education, which provides for the education of children with disabilities in general education institutions. The danger of bullying grows at times when someone completely different from them appears next to the children.

For example, Nick Vuychich is a disabled person from birth (no arms and legs). His father sent him to a regular school so that his son would consider himself a normal person. But classmates mocked Nick, who because of this was going to commit suicide.

School bullying is extremely dangerous. It occurs at the time of growing up, self-identification, personality formation, mastering moral norms, developing stereotypes in relations with the opposite sex, positioning oneself in a team.

The protagonists of school bullying are socially immature individuals. Their behavior is “fueled” by hormonal storms and, accordingly, mental instability of both the aggressors and the victims.

Additional dangers are the duration of the stressful situation, its duration in time. Plus, the child’s unwillingness to share his problems with adults, to fight for the right to leave the problem team.

How does school bullying work?

Aggression can be individual or group. And the object of bullying can be both an individual person and a group of schoolchildren. A distinction is usually made between physical and psychological (emotional) bullying.

Physical bullying is not only a beating, but also “lighter” means of influence. For example, slaps, kicks, trips, pinching, pushing, hair pulling, bullying strokes, or other unwanted touching.

Psychological or emotional abuse is most often manifested verbally – in statements that contain ridicule, irony, sarcasm.

It can be name-calling, teasing, foul language, offensive nicknames, labels, threats, gossip, slander, untrue funny stories, provoking humiliating situations, systematic kidnapping or damage to things. But the means of influence can also be the complete absence of any contacts: a boycott.

Signs that a child is being bullied

Children are sometimes silent about problems. They can blame themselves for everything. Suffer from feelings of guilt, be afraid of overreacting from parents or worsening the situation due to their intervention. Beware of accusations that they are “snitches, informers, snitches.”

Therefore, you need to know well the signs that may indicate school bullying:

• bruises, abrasions, scratches, torn clothes. They should be alerted to their regular occurrence, regardless of the reliability of the child’s explanation of each particular case);
• spoiled, broken things (school supplies, textbooks, gadgets, jewelry, items of clothing);
• a request for additional pocket money that may be intended for extortionists and blackmailers;
• frequent illnesses, complaints of poor health. Headache or stomach pain, sleep problems (insomnia, nightmares);
• deterioration in academic performance, loss of interest in classes, absenteeism. Refusal to go to school for various reasons;
• bad mood after returning from school. Constant depression, impressionability, anxiety, tearfulness, or, on the contrary – irritability, aggressiveness;
• loneliness, lack of school friends and acquaintances;
• a strange road to school — a long, uncomfortable, roundabout way;
• eating problems: excessive or no appetite;
• painful feelings about their appearance or other factors that make the child “different”;
• escape from home, self-harm, suicidal manifestations.

School bullying can further:

• negatively affect self-esteem, provoke the development of complexes, self-awareness of oneself as a loser, a person of the third grade;
• provoke nervous and mental disorders, phobias, depression, nervous diseases, tics;
• break the victim’s relationship with family and friends, as well as in any team;
• consolidate negative scenarios in relationships with members of the opposite sex;
• prevent the building of a healthy family, even lead to loneliness for life;
• develop a propensity for violence in adulthood. It is from the victims of bullying that family tyrants and maniacs often grow.

Bullying can be caused by:

• disability, physical disabilities, external defects. For example: weakness, soreness, myopia, scars, lameness, squint, stuttering, enuresis, overweight, red hair, freckles;
• flaws in speech and intelligence;
• any mental differences from ordinary people – mental retardation or, on the contrary, “too high” abilities. Accordingly, poor or too good academic performance;
• a different race, nationality, religion, skin color, appearance, which are not inherent in a particular region;
• low level of family income and, accordingly, poorer clothes, lack of gadgets;
• social and emotional immaturity, non-compliance with the norms of written and unwritten rules;
• everything that distinguishes a child from others.

Violence against themselves can be provoked by:

• children from socially disadvantaged, large, single-parent families. Children of families with atypical demeanor and lifestyle;
• overly patronized by parents “home” children who have no experience of behavior in a team. They do not know how to communicate, build relationships with peers;
• emotionally unstable, mentally unstable, fearful, anxious, withdrawn, quiet, modest, insecure children;
• too impressionable, who do not adequately respond to jokes and non-standard situations;
• favorites of teachers and children who find it easier to communicate with adults;
• sloppy, poorly dressed children who do not adhere to hygiene, with dirty hair, an unpleasant odor;
• newcomers in the classroom or those who have been absent for a long time (conditionally newcomers);
• any because of the intrigues and cunning of the same age. The motive can be envy, jealousy, suspicion, revenge. In this case, intrigues, slander, gossip are used.

Unfortunately, teachers are also involved in the bullying process. Sometimes they act as initiators or even aggressors. Teachers are ordinary people with their own mentality, personality traits and vices. They can also be affected by all of the above factors.

Teachers may subconsciously feel irritation about a “dissimilar” child, share the opinion that the victim is “guilty herself”, “does not behave like that”. They are annoyed by the child’s overly pronounced internal independence, thinking outside the box, high mental abilities, and the habit of asking difficult questions.

As well as disobedience and “inconvenience” in learning due to hyperactivity, painful shyness, mental retardation.

The teacher may indulge in bullying because she does not notice or does not want to notice the problem. He has insufficient experience or a low level of qualifications. He underestimates the danger of bullying, mistakenly believing that it is better not to interfere: the children, they say, “will figure it out themselves.”

If a teacher has a high moral authority, is respected by children and parents, his clearly articulated position is quite enough to stop the bullying.

 Video compilation

Tips: Bullying at school: how to deal with it

Bullying Stories: School Bullying: How to Fight

My dear reader: teacher, schoolboy, student, do not forget that you are a person. I hope that the advice from this article will be useful to you in solving life’s problems.

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