My head can’t remember all this! — Maybe. The head can do anything!
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Beliefs are uncritically learned and uncritically formulated beliefs about self, people and the world.
Each person has beliefs about himself (for example, “I learn everything new quickly” or “the computer is not for me”), there are beliefs about people around (“people are mostly good”, “people cannot be trusted”), there are beliefs about the world and life (“life is black and white and behind the white stripe it will definitely be black”, “life is joyful and always good!”). A separate article is the beliefs and beliefs of girls in relation to men …
For example: you should not go to visit your married friend while you are still a girl, as a strange husband will look at you with the wrong eyes and you will do a disservice to your dear friend; there is no friendship between men and women; they marry a virgin once and for all; men cannot be trusted, but you cannot quarrel with them, so you need to be clever, deceive and get your way smartly. These are the rules of life with a secret enemy, i.e. well recognizable settings of the marginal culture of the first urban generation. Either way, these are ideas that are hard to live with.
Problematic beliefs about the world are usually called prejudices, beliefs about yourself and your capabilities are self-esteem and self-image.
These are those (usually not conscious or not fully conscious) assumptions about people and the world that a person refuses to either question or confirm with any arguments. Not just the absence, but precisely the internal refusal to confirm their ideas with arguments and arguments makes them beliefs, irrational attitudes.
The less often people think, the more often they live not by beliefs, but by beliefs.
According to the format of belief can be:
- Positive and negative. Example: I’m cool! and I’m stupid … (you can guess which of the beliefs is positive!)
Negative beliefs can sometimes play the role of a “pinarik” (read magic pendel), that is, a motivator — then they are needed. Although there is some trap here — do not forget about positive and negative motivation.
- Responsible and irresponsible (I decided! — I had to …)
- Liberating (moving) — limiting (inhibiting) For example, I can do it! — or «I am not given…» See Limiting and Liberating Beliefs
- Conflictogenic — synthonic («All people are bastards!» or «People are kind»)
- Adequate and not. («Everything I love must always be mine»).
In an offensive and aggressive form, beliefs turn into must-nanism — rigid, absolutist, not taking into account realities, categorically normative and persistent ideas about what life should be like and what relations between people should be.
Negative, conflicting, irresponsible, and limiting are generally problematic beliefs. There is a hypothesis that constructive beliefs work better for our purposes: adequate, positive, responsible, moving and syntonic beliefs. Beliefs permeate our whole life. Beliefs affect our situational emotions and overall mood. It can be said that our emotions are a mirror of our beliefs, and by changing our beliefs we can control many of our emotions. Beliefs allow, forbid, or prescribe us to do or something else, and through this, our beliefs affect not only us, but also the people around us. Beliefs create our rules of life for us, serve as a guideline in choosing goals. In the hands of a person who lives consciously, this is a tool for managing himself, his views, his behavior. However, more often, due to their unconsciousness, beliefs interfere with us.
Working with Beliefs
Beliefs have nothing to do with religiousness or non-religiosity, and working with beliefs is part of the usual psychological, psychotherapeutic and pedagogical work, including coaching. The main areas for which work with beliefs is usually carried out are a state of inner good, stable self-motivation, established relationships with others and overall success.
For example, behind the habit of resentment, there are usually two kinds of beliefs: beliefs «good — bad» («G.e.st — this is bad!») And beliefs about how to react to something «bad» because it’s outrageous!»). If the first belief (“Gu.e.st is bad!”) is rather reasonable and adequate, then the second belief (“Gu.e.st you need to be indignant!”) is quite debatable. The policeman will stop the police because it violates public order, and it is not obvious that something will anger him.
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