He promised that he would love until death. They built an apartment together. Over the years, they worked together to be a happy married couple who live beyond their means. Extra work and raising new funds. Everything for the family. They raised two children together. The daughter graduated from medicine and the son just got into architecture. However, this Harlequin story does not have a happy ending. Why? Because one day he left home and never came back. “I feel old and I need a change.” After all, I can’t live like an old grandfather – he told her on the day of the divorce, to which he came in ripped jeans, a t-shirt and youth sneakers.
Absurd behavior, loss of mind or maybe the problem of age? More and more men after the age of 40 are starting to summarize their lives. The time passes when they are the most important people in the lives of their partners and children. The wife becomes a habit and the son or daughter begins to arrange his life.
Gray everyday life begins and life turns into a duty, sometimes unpleasant. If you add graying hair and loss of physical fitness to this, it can be said that it is not good. Sometimes this state is a temporary turmoil. Sometimes, however, this settled man begins his second life – in fear of old age and infirmity.
What are the reasons for such behavior?
This problem cannot be classified under a specific disease entity, because it is not a disease. Midlife crisis is state of mindwho begins to demand sensations for fear of losing his teenage years. Overcomplicated clothes, caricatured self-care are the first signs of a breakdown of a man who wants to regain his youth at all costs. Andropause, because this is the name of this state, is nothing more than mobilization of the body to the desire to achieve new sensations. A change in eating style, a new passion or boundless devotion to a newly met younger colleague are the first signs of change.
From extreme to extreme
Not surprisingly, this condition is often referred to in medical slogans as “the age of the wacko.” From minor lifestyle changes to depression. Along the way, there may be a desire to explore what is still undiscovered. A man loses his enthusiasm, a failed sex life or lack of it, aversion to familiar company or jealousy that his son brings another girl home. All of this leads to behaviors that he would never have done before.
Honest conversation – a cure for all evil?
Yes and no. Both the woman who sees the unnatural behavior of her partner and the man who notices a change in thinking about himself need a change conversation. Before taking any action, it is best to talk about it with someone close to you, who can assess the whole situation looking at it more objectively than the interested parties themselves. If there is a problem, you need to solve it by finding the cause. This rule also works in this case.
Hopes related to radical change may quickly cease to satisfy the imaginary needs that were born overnight under a balding head of hair. Therefore, it is worth reflecting before acting and asking yourself – what I really miss in my mature life.