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How does daddy’s baby blues manifest itself?
Four in ten fathers would be affected by daddy’s baby blues. These are the figures announced by an American study on the baby blues for men. Indeed, the dad does not always react as he would like to the arrival of his child. He who is aware of living a moment of unique happiness, however, does not manage to fully enjoy it. Sadness, fatigue, irritability, stress, lack of appetite, difficulty falling asleep, withdrawal into oneself… The depression sets in. So many symptoms that should attract attention. He feels abandoned by the mother who only has eyes for her little one. Now is the time to act.
Daddy’s baby blues: don’t hesitate to talk about it
When the dad is a victim of the baby blues, dialogue is essential. While the latter tends to make him feel guilty, he must first be made to accept his condition and avoid at all costs that he does not lock himself in silence. Sometimes, a simple discussion with his partner and / or those around him about his discomfort can unblock things. The mother must also comfort her companion by explaining to him that the baby is not his rival and will not take his place. On the contrary, it is about forming a united family. This child is also his and he has a very important role to play. Reminding him of these obvious little things is essential.
Daddy’s Baby Blues: Helping Him Find His Father’s Place
Becoming a daddy hen is not innate. Overnight, the man passes from the status of son to that of father by becoming responsible for a small being. Even if he had nine months to prepare for it, it is not always easy to get used to it, especially at the beginning. The relationship between mother and baby, often fusional, can also cause some frustrations. The dad must then impose himself gently. Helped by his partner, he will gradually forge a relationship with his child: hugs, caresses, looks… The mother must also make people feel that she needs to rest on the father. This way, he will feel indispensable.
To overcome daddy’s baby blues: help him gain confidence
He does not manage to calm the crying of the baby, he is a little clumsy in his gestures? It is essential to reassure him of his capacity to be a father. Change, baths, care, dressing, bottles, etc. So many moments that the dad can share with his child. But initially, this one does not necessarily dare. Fear of doing wrong, idealization of a perfect father… In short, it is not easy to find one’s feet. He must be encouraged to continue. This is how he will establish a special relationship with his child and will realize that he too is perfectly capable of taking matters into his own hands.
Prevent daddy’s baby blues: everyone has their place
Men do not experience the birth of a child in the same way as women. In this new trio, everyone must find their place. The dad now takes on the role of father and companion. Sometimes it takes a while for him to adjust. As for the mother, between physical and psychological upheaval, her man’s gaze can sometimes change. So be patient …
The resumption of sexual relations can also be a trigger. Everyone then finds their place as a man and a woman, essential for the couple. The woman must also be reminded that she is not just a mother. And pamper her: bouquet of flowers, romantic dinner, impromptu gifts… Nothing better to rekindle the flame and strengthen ties!
How to avoid daddy’s baby blues?
It is important to act in time so that this temporary depression does not turn into postnatal depression. If the symptoms persist or worsen several months after childbirth, it is best to consult a specialist who will help the dad to overcome this difficult passage and find the right balance between his role of father and that of companion. Certain associations may also provide him with some advice or direct him to specialists. This is the case of Mom Bluesthat doesn’t just help moms with baby blues. She also supports dads.
Do you want to talk about it between parents? To give your opinion, to bring your testimony? We meet on https://forum.parents.fr.