Anorgasmia, which is the absence of orgasm during sexual intercourse, is part of sexual disorders and dysfunctions. This pathology, often confused with frigidity or dysorgasmia, is often caused by a psychological origin. How to diagnose it and what are the solutions to remedy it?

Anorgasmia is a sexual disorder that results in the inability to reach orgasm. Although the person experiences excitement and pleasure during sexual intercourse, it does not allow reaching the stage of orgasm (not to be confused with anaphrodisia, where in this case, the person feels neither desire nor sexual pleasure). This pathology, which affects a majority of women, but also men, can be caused by different reasons: psychological, medical, etc. It is considered to be “primary” if the subject has never experienced orgasm during his life, and “secondary” if it appears suddenly during life. Anorgasmia is not inevitable and can quite be cured, thanks to various means.

Anorgasmia, whether female or male, can be caused by different symptoms. Often, psychological causes are at the origin of this disorder. Indeed, sexuality is very much linked to the psyche, and the mind has a huge influence on libido and the ability to experience pleasure. Thus, a shock or a strong emotion (a separation, a death, a phase of depression, etc.) or a trauma (sexual abuse, etc.) can be the cause of a primary or secondary anorgasmia. Likewise, a lack of self-confidence, embarrassment or a strong shyness can also be at the origin. Indeed, reaching orgasm involves succeeding in letting go a minimum, and not controlling your body and your pleasure for a while. Finally, there are also physiological or medical causes, such as vaginismus or sexual dryness, which can be diagnosed by a healthcare professional.

Although often associated with women, anorgasmia also affects men. As in women, they experience a feeling of blockage that prevents them from going “to the end” of their pleasure and reaching orgasm, or maximum pleasure. This disorder then manifests itself in different ways: either the man experiences difficulty in having an erection, or difficulty in ejaculating, or he ejaculates but without reaching orgasm. Indeed, it is often considered that an ejaculation is equivalent to an orgasm. This is wrong: ejaculation is a physiological response of the human body, but which is not necessarily caused by an orgasm, which is linked to the psyche. A man can completely ejaculate without having experienced pleasure: this is called anhedonic ejaculation.

If you think you have anorgasmia, there are ways to overcome this disorder and achieve orgasm. If you have already experienced it in your life, it will be easier as you can recognize when it does happen. If it is a primary anorgasmia, don’t panic: with some help and patience, it is quite possible to cure it. Talking to a psychologist or sex therapist about your disorder can be very helpful in successfully determining the cause of your anorgasmia and working together on solutions. Masturbation is also a solution, given that it allows you to discover and understand your body, to better understand your desire. Finally, relaxation exercises, such as breathing techniques or muscle relaxation can also promote letting go.

Orgasm is often considered, wrongly, to be the sine qua non of a fulfilling sex life. However, it is quite possible to experience pleasure during intercourse without reaching orgasm each time, if at all. Indeed, whether it is during a two-person sexual relationship or while masturbating, one can feel a strong sexual pleasure and be satisfied. Take the time to explore your body, listen to your desires and fantasies. So, if you can’t overcome your anorgasmia, don’t see it as failure or inevitability: if you focus on your disorder, it can snowball, and block you further.