A new study has shown that men and women have different views on how and why they do it.
Some love it, others can’t stand it, some tried it, and some just thought about it. Be that as it may, today anal sex is gradually being excluded from the list of forbidden topics for discussion.
However, the reasons that motivate young women to have anal sex are far from always reasonable, as a recent study by British scientists has shown *. They collected information about young people’s attitudes towards sex and sexuality by interviewing 130 heterosexual men and women aged 16 to 18 from cities and suburbs in England. And found that men and women are very different about anal sex.
In the male narrative, anal sex is associated with enjoyment and macho sexual behavior. And women say that they are afraid of physical pain and how it will affect their reputation.
Men often report wanting anal sex in imitation of pornographic films and because it is more pleasurable than vaginal penetration.
And women mostly say that it gave pleasure to their partner.
Both genders agree that women do not do this on their own initiative and assume that they will be hurt. If they refuse anal sex, they are very worried about it. The wording «if you try, you’ll like it» was often mentioned as a way to coax a woman. At the same time, many survey participants did not know that sexually transmitted diseases are easily transmitted during anal sex.
The study involved only a small sample, so the opinions given are, of course, not shared by all men and women, especially among those who are older and in long-term partnerships. And yet there is something to think about. For example, about harmful stereotypes and gender roles that are associated with ideas about anal sex.
Interest in anal sex is growing — sexologist and sex therapist Christine Milrod attributes this phenomenon to pornography. However, she reminds me, it’s important to keep in mind that pornography is not a form of sexual education at all, and that what is shown there is often completely unrealistic. Not all women are equally fond of anal sex. Some find it enjoyable, others find it painful. But most importantly, anal sex should never be something you do under duress.
The main advice of a sex therapist is to not give in to pressure from your partner if you are not ready or just do not want to try. “Some women don’t like it, and they don’t have to do it at all,” emphasizes Christine Milrod.
But if you and your partner both want to try it, then she advises using plenty of lube, taking it slow, and making sure to use a condom to protect yourself and your partner from various infections, including STDs.
And also relax, do not forget about your pleasure and communicate freely with your partner. Sex should be enjoyable for both participants, and if you are no longer pleased, then do not hesitate to tell your partner about it. “Women too often continue to do what a man asks them to because they want to please him,” says Christine Milrod. It’s time for women to decide for themselves what kind of sex they want and what they want to do.
* http://www.womenshealthmag.com/sex-and-relationships/anal-sex