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It is very difficult to decide and do something that has never been done before. We are stopped by fear. Fear of the unknown, fear of making the wrong choice, fear of ruining your life. Will this be the right move? What awaits us there? Wouldn’t it be safer to leave things as they are? How to overcome them?
Before the Wright brothers, we didn’t know we could fly. Before Tesla, we were afraid of lightning and could not imagine that electricity would be in every home. Fear is both a gift that protects us from danger, and at the same time an obsession that makes us petrify.
But there is one thing that feeds fear and helps it grow, and that is our attempts to avoid it. I can’t tell you how many times I was afraid of the future, and then every morning I found myself in it — and it was not so scary.
When we ignore fear, it grows stronger, but it also grows when we only half dare to approach it. So we freeze, not having the courage to move forward.
A Simple Technique to Overcome Hesitation Caused by Fear of Making the Wrong Choice
1. Write a letter from your future reality
Take a piece of paper and write your name on it.
Think about the difficult choice you are hesitant to make and how it will change your life in the next six months.
Think about all the pros and cons, how much work you need to put into it. Think about how it will look in detail: who you will be with, where you will be, what you will do and who will surround you.
When a living picture appears in front of you, take a pen and write a letter to yourself from there, from your fulfilled future. Don’t forget that this letter is from you of the future — you of today, who are still considering what choice to make.
Tell me about how you’re doing. What did you like and what obstacles did you have to overcome. Tell me why it’s good that you did it this way and not otherwise.
At the end, be sure to express gratitude to yourself. For doing all the hard work and choosing to make a difference in your life. When you’re done, fold the paper and set it aside.
2. Write a letter from your other future
Now take another sheet. On this sheet you will write the same letter, but about how you made a different choice.
All the same. Write about a difficult decision you made six months ago. That you had to fight with a lot and you succeeded a lot. As detailed as you can.
Remember that this letter should also end with gratitude to yourself for making this choice and not regretting it.
Now put both letters aside for a while.
3. Reread both letters
After a few days or a week, open them and reread them. Pay attention to how you will read them. Will you be relieved by reading one of them? Which one will inspire fear in you? Did something change in you after you re-read these letters from your two future ones now?
This is a very useful exercise, after it it will become easier for you to finally decide and choose one of the two. Especially if you feel fear at the same time.
And that’s why. By writing these letters, you have looked fear in the eye. You have shown that he does not control you, that you are free to choose your future, whether it goes one way or the other.
This exercise also helps you visualize each of these choices in reality. Describing what they will lead to in all details, not forgetting either good or bad, you begin to feel more clearly what your inner instinct is telling you now.
About the judge: Samuel McCree is a coach.