His Olympic silver was a significant point in his sports career and the beginning of a quiet coaching life in quiet New Jersey. Who could have imagined that 12 years later he would have the chance to once again experience the intensity of competition and great success in his homeland? A meeting with a person who knows the price of victory and defeat and who puts his family happiness above other achievements.
This photo shoot ended in a lot of fun. Camera flashes alternated with bursts of friendly laughter: Alexander Zhulin posed artistically and funny, parodying the characters of fashion magazines. In a respectable man, a charming school bully woke up for a moment – which was quite unexpected. We knew him as the lyrical partner of the beautiful Maya Usova in ice dancing. Then – an impenetrable, serious and strong-willed coach of the Olympic champions Tatyana Navka and Roman Kostomarov. The TV show “Stars on Ice” opened a new Alexander Zhulin – a characteristic artist and a stylish man who conquered the female audience with his restraint, sensual gaze and inner strength. With his undisguised love for his wife Tatyana Navka, who turned out to be a rival on the ice. And a reverent attitude towards partner Ingeborg Dapkunaite. Talented choreographer and leader. Reliable, self-confident, elegant – isn’t this the perfect object for women’s fantasies? Alexander came to our studio after a daily morning workout – with a bag on wheels and a politely indifferent expression on his face. He is already used to giving interviews, and it’s a little boring for him, sometimes unpleasant: “The questions are the same: you and Maya, you and Tatyana, divorce-love-marriage …” These topics take him back to the past again and again, return to which is not always comfortable … Alexander speaks slowly, without looking into his eyes and not trying to impress, as if he is telling his life to himself once again.
Psychologies: After 12 years of measured life in America, you came to Russia and immediately found yourself in the spotlight. Did you like it?
Alexander Zhulin: To be honest, I like it so far. I don’t know for how long? You are right, it was as if I flew to another planet and ended up in the epicenter of all events. Now I’m waiting for those days when I can devote time to myself: do fitness, play football or tennis. Then everything will be in perfect harmony.
Was there more free time in America?
A. Zh.: Yes, but there I really lacked communication, a cultural environment. I worked, took care of myself and philosophized a lot.
What lifestyle do you like?
A. Zh.: Something in between. New Jersey is a unique place: only 20 minutes from New York, we have a big house there, lawns, silence. Now, if Moscow were in the place of New York … I would be happy. Gathered impressions – and in a quiet harbor.
Aren’t you bored when you’re alone?
A. Zh.: No, on the contrary, it is very easy. I had a period in my life – when I was already divorced, but not yet married. And lived alone for about six months. I even went to restaurants alone. It bothered me at first, but then I got used to it. Sometimes it’s good to be alone.
You have always been connected with your life partners by one thing, common goals, interests. What are the benefits of such a relationship?
A. Zh.: There is always something to talk about, and it’s easier to understand each other because you don’t have to explain to your partner how much you work and how much you get tired. But I have no experience of other relationships – maybe there are even more pluses?
What about pitfalls?
A. Zh.: They also exist. When you spend all the time together, you can get tired of each other. But I’ll be honest: Tatyana and I have been together for almost 12 years, and during all this time we have not had any conflict situations – none at all. Apparently, when there is true love, the rest is no longer important. You simply do not notice the pitfalls or smooth out conflicts yourself, that’s all.
The theme of the “Dossier” of this issue is “To love and remain free.” Is it about your family?
A. Zh.: Absolutely. But this is not the kind of freedom when one of us can say: “I won’t come home tonight, I have a lot of work.” Or: “Do whatever you want, the main thing is that I don’t know anything.” If Tatyana goes to some event or starts a new project, I trust her and give her complete freedom. As is she to me. At the same time, we always call each other once again, tell each other how we spent the day.
The family is an obligation imposed on oneself of good will?
A. Zh.: Undoubtedly. At some point, I decided for myself: if you love a person and want to stay with him for life, you have to fight for this love every day. You have to wake up every morning and like the one you live with. And for this you need to take care of yourself: be in shape, take care of your face, do procedures. And if my wife will lure me sexually every day, like a woman, and I, for my part, will do the same for her, then you can save a happy marriage for many, many years.
This is serious work!
A. Zh.: Yes, but Tanya and I enjoy it.
Your couple is always in sight. Does it interfere?
A. Zh.: No. I am very calm about PR and fame. I am perfectly aware of who I am and what my place in this life is. And I will never say that the world revolves around me.
Has this attitude to success come with age?
A. Zh.: Real fame came to me at the age of 30, at the 1994 Olympics, when I was already a fairly mature person. Even then I did not have a star disease. Although to be honest, that victory was very significant for me. And now, 13 years later, when my students became Olympic champions, and the show with our participation is so popular in the country, I am much more calm. I stand firmly on my feet and know exactly what is most valuable to me in life. This is my family, child and favorite thing that I do. Even if I were offered a million dollars for an uninteresting job, I would not do it.
However, at one time you regarded your silver Olympic medal as a defeat.
A. Zh.: At first, it really felt like a failure. After all, we were the leaders of the season, they staked on us, we had to win. We must have made a mistake in something. But I never blame anyone for the defeat – only myself. Then, in 1994, I had a real depression. For two days I could not talk at all, it seemed to me that the whole world had turned upside down. And then I thought: “So what, now remember this silver for the rest of your life? How many people would give everything for this medal! And we beat the strongest couples in the world – this is happiness! And with such thoughts, I began to live more calmly. I realized that sport is only one chapter in my life. Did you write this chapter? Now move on. But then, when I coached Tatiana and Roman, I already clearly knew what was needed for a complete victory.
Since then, you have not known defeat?
A. Zh.: There were defeats. But Tanya and I look for the positive in any situation. Lost – great. We must draw the right conclusions and not make mistakes next time. And if you win, you must not forget that there is a new goal ahead – and move on.
We are talking about sports. What do you see as failure in life?
A. Zh.: If there was some kind of life drama and you gave up – got drunk, sank, became fat and angry at everyone – this will probably be a defeat.
Do you know this?
A. Zh.: I can go into depression: lie on the bed, stupidly watch TV and want nothing. But it lasts two days, no more. So far, I can pull myself together and get out of this state with honor. I think that this will continue.
Where does this skill come from?
A. Zh.: I don’t know… It always seemed to me that a person should fight to the end with his problems. I had a chance in my life. We went skating with Maya Usova in Vilnius. It was the moment of formation of our couple. Bestemyanova and Bukin, public idols, Olympic champions skated in front of us – all scores are 6,0, the hall is standing, all the ice is littered with flowers. And now, after them, we, 20-year-old pods, come out and tremble like two aspen leaves. And I always dreamed of being only the first. And then I thought: why go out on the ice? How can these people be played? It was a tragedy! We somehow skated, took our 5th place. And only later, over time, when we still began to beat the champions, I realized that you should never give up. You can always come up with some kind of move – new, unexpected. There is a solution for every situation. Sometimes it seems that you will never do this … You live, for example, in the city of Korolev, huddle in some kind of communal apartment …
Are you talking about yourself?
A. Zh.: Yes… And when you drive along some central street in Moscow, you look around and think: “And people live here! They live beautifully, they have apartments, cars … ”This was from the realm of transcendental fantasies. And now you live in the center and drive a good car – and nothing, it’s fine. The fairy tale has become a reality. Moreover, I never set myself such tasks – by all means to buy a summer house, a car … Everything turned out as if by itself … You just have to do your job well and enjoy it. Everything else is falling apart.
Do you rate your age as an advantage?
A. Zh.: (He chuckles.) Yes. Now some special age has come … A correct understanding of life has come. And at the same time, the body is still young. It would be better to hold out! (Laughs.) Previously, the body was better, more flexible, it hurt less, but the brain let it down a little. I was subject to all sorts of emotions: it could lead in the wrong direction. Now I look at everything more sensibly: “Why chop the same firewood – then rake it all my life with a wide shovel. No I do not want to. We’ve been through this before.” Such an understanding – yes, it would be earlier … I would not have made any mistakes. But in the end, all the mistakes are mine, I live with them and feel fine.
The sharpness of sensations also disappears with age …
A. Zh.: Unfortunately yes. But there are some other advantages. Some kind of sensitivity appears, even vulnerability and an absolutely conscious attitude towards the child, wife, parents. Completely different brains. And the amount of love that I am able to give now, I would not have given 10 years ago.
Has fatherhood changed you?
A. Zh.: Very much. 50 percent.
Can you describe this feeling?
A. Zh.: I can. It’s like they put a thorn in your heart that you won’t be able to take out until the end of your days. Now you have to live with this: protect, protect, worry. The first two years you feel it especially sharply. Then you get used to it a little, and only positive emotions remain – by 99,9%.
Do fears go away too?
A. Zh.: They must be fought. You can protect a child, explain something to him, but you can’t turn into a maniac who follows his every step. My daughter is from a sports family – she must fill her bumps for sure.
Does your personal childhood experience help you now?
A. Zh.: Rather hinders. Because my parents raised me in absolute love. I was spoiled by them to the point of impossibility. As a rule, such upbringing gives a very strong impetus to personal development: you live with the feeling that you are the best, strong, beautiful, everyone loves you and you can do everything.
What’s wrong with that?
A. Zh.: So I pampered Sasha even more! (Laughs.) To be honest… in my youth I did a lot of bad things to people – precisely because I was spoiled. He treated his mother and grandmother ugly, enjoyed their love. It seems to me that if they were more demanding, if they had reined in at the right time, I would still feel their love! And that would only make it better. Realizing this, I began to raise my daughter more strictly. But still, I am extremely grateful to my parents.
How did a spoiled child become a champion?
A. Zh.: Thanks to my father: he managed to awaken ambition in me. When I learned to ride, my father said: “I’m standing here, freezing, and you can’t jump your salchow! Weak!” Everything! For me, it was worse than being beaten. Until I do something to prove it to him, I won’t leave. And it remains in me until now: I will not rest until I achieve my goal.
The boy from Korolev had ambition and clear goals in life. Do you have a goal today?
A. Zh.: Now I’m a little lost. Until recently, my goal was very clear: the Olympic gold of my students. My personal career took place, everything suited me in family life. And this goal has been achieved – incredible happiness … And then what? What to strive for? Then “Stars on Ice” fell on us, and we moved to Russia … Thank God, I created a group in Moscow, I go to training and begin to enjoy my work a lot. Now I need to figure out for myself where to go. It can be anything: raise new champions, write a book, star in a movie, build a house. But I need this goal. To not just go with the flow, but to live with meaning.
So you don’t know a midlife crisis?
A. Zh.: I had such a period: on the eve of my fortieth birthday, Tanya experienced the greatest torment in her life. (Laughs.) Because I, in principle, a very positive person, turned into a kind of old man who sat at home and whined that everything was bad, life was not successful … This went on for three weeks – some kind of horror! But as soon as I turned 40 years and one day old, I woke up a completely different person – happy and cheerful. I realized that nothing had happened, the world had not turned upside down and everything was in order. The crisis has passed me by. When can we expect the next one?
Private bussiness
1963 July 20 Born in the city of Korolyov, in a family of engineers.
1968 He began to study in the figure skating section in Korolev.
1980 He began training with Maya Usova with coach Natalya Dubova (ice dancing) in Moscow.
1986 On May 24, he marries Maya Usova.
1989, 1992 Silver medalist of the European and World Championships in figure skating.
1990, 1991 Bronze medalist of the world championships.
1992 Bronze medalist of the XVI Winter Olympic Games in Albertville.
1993 Champion of Europe and the world.
1994 Silver medalist of the XVII Winter Olympic Games in Lillehammer. Maya and Alexander break up.
2000 Marries Tatyana Navka. On May 2, Alexander and Tatiana had a daughter, Alexander.
2004, 2005 His students Tatyana Navka and Roman Kostomarov become European and world champions in ice dancing.
2006 Tatyana Navka and Roman Kostomarov are the champions of the XX Winter Olympic Games in Turin; Tatyana and Alexander become finalists of the television show “Stars on Ice”.