Alcoholism is a serious disease that systematically destroys the life of a person and his family and turns him into a threat to everyone around him. Why do people fall into the clutches of alcoholism? How to get rid of this harmful addiction?
Dirty curtains do not let in light, tobacco smoke has eaten into the brick through the wallpaper, Uncle Zhenya is sleeping on a sagging sofa with a smoking cigarette in his hand. That is how he stayed in my memory. I still remember how he tore money and a passport. How endlessly he lay in hospitals, coded, sewn up, untied, adding cognac drop by drop to coffee …
I also remember how Uncle Zhenya would crawl back beaten up, lose money, trade vodka underground in the 90s. I remember how he swore on his knees to his grandmother and father that not a drop more … I remember how kind and cheerful he was when he was almost sober. And how he drank six bottles of vodka a day. How he died in the hospital at 45.
The whispered word «alcoholic» somehow felt ashamed to the touch, like «Jew» or «immigrant.» It was not customary in the family to discuss uncle’s alcoholism, they were waiting for the “bright head” to take up his mind, to come to his senses, like all “normal” people.
In medical school, I learned that alcoholism (or alcohol addiction syndrome) is a disease that is listed by the World Health Organization, along with cancer and diabetes, but I did not stop evaluating alcoholics. They seemed to me weak-willed and inferior. After all, it seems that it is easier — pull yourself together — stop, do not drink or drink like cultured people.
After defending my dissertation, having completed training in addiction therapy, having spent hundreds of sessions, I realized how wrong I was.
Alcohol addiction is a disease that affects a person at all levels of existence: bodily, mental, social, spiritual. The alcoholic is unable to stop. When alcohol enters his body, he continues to drink until he is completely unconscious. Physician William Silkworth, who specializes in addiction therapy, called this phenomenon «allergies.»
During sober periods, an alcoholic turns on a passion of a different kind — a mental obsession that forces him to drink alcohol in any way. Alcoholics show monstrous willpower to find alcohol, stop at nothing. This is a tragic existence. I have heard the comparison that alcoholism is like having sex with a gorilla: you have to have sex for as long as the gorilla wants.
It is believed that the problem of alcoholics is that they drink a lot. This is not true! The main problem is different — they can not live sober. Subjectively, this is felt as a deep existential dissatisfaction with oneself, life, and the world around. Metaphorically, they describe this state as a “hole in the soul”, where alcohol is constantly required to be poured, like anesthesia, in order not to feel pain and fear of living.
Despite my family scores with alcoholism, I admit that as a psychotherapist I am powerless. Psychotherapy can only be part of a complex work. Along with it, detoxification, rehabilitation in specialized centers and visits to self-help groups in the Alcoholics Anonymous community, which work according to the classic 12-step program, are necessary. Information about Alcoholics Anonymous in our country is often drawn from humorous programs, serials and Western films.
In reality, universal human values operate in these communities: selflessness, support and love.
In Russia, hundreds of free self-help groups take place every day, where sober alcoholics meet who do not drink. They share their recovery experience with each other, speak the same language, without judgment or criticism. Participants receive the support of the group, develop new ways of socialization. According to the chief psychiatrist-narcologist of the Ministry of Health of Russia Yevgeny Bryun, the percentage of recovery among members of the Alcoholics Anonymous community is three times higher than the average.
“There is a lot of loneliness in addiction. Those who attend meetings have the opportunity to feel that they are not alone, they can empathize with those who understand how difficult it is — and they can respond with sympathy, says psychotherapist Alla Radchenko. — In addition, the members of the group do not make “steps” on their own, they are supported.
A very important part of the program is approval. Any addiction is associated with a lack or lack of approval in the life of the addict. Approval does not happen much, it does not look like primitive flattery. The AA program involves a lot of approval, and this is an important advantage of it. In addition, we all tend to narrow our community a lot and know little about how other people’s lives turn out differently. It is useful to learn about this, especially in difficult situations.”
One of the ways to help yourself or a loved one is to join a non-profit project : round-the-clock Internet broadcasting in support of people who want to get rid of alcohol addiction. It was created by an initiative group of anonymous alcoholics on a volunteer basis. Here you can hear the experience of recovering alcoholics, news from the community of Alcoholics Anonymous, live programs and interviews.