An adult in an adult position.
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Adult Position is a look and a state that a person can evoke in himself, create and maintain. This is a position of personal responsibility. “I am responsible for what I should be responsible for, you should be responsible for yours.”
How is the Inner Adult different from the Adult Position?
If the Adult in us happens by itself, if it happens by itself, we are talking about the inner Adult within us. If we ourselves made ourselves adults, if we were in an active position, we are talking about the position of an Adult. We chose the position of the Adult, we stood in the adult position. They are looking for the Internal Adult in themselves, they create the position of the Adult.
Conversations about the Inner Adult are more often conducted by psychotherapists working with clients who do not have the habit of an active and responsible position. In the syntone approach, the question of the position of an adult is posed as a requirement: “Are you an adult? How does an adult behave in this situation?
The position of the Adult is the position of a business-like, calm person, predominantly in the third position of perception.
Basic installation: I do what is right from the point of view of the case, without unnecessary emotions and conversations. I need — I’ll do it. You need — you do it.
Emotional palette: calm presence, warm goodwill, absence of bright and impulsive emotions.
Intonation and styles of address: all business — to consult and coordinate interests, a neutrally expressed reasonable request, an energetic business proposal, information about desire and a specific order.
Possible manifestations:
Each position (parent-adult-child) has different manifestations — both positive and negative.
Positive manifestations of the position of an adult — a confident leader, knows what he wants and calmly achieves it. Possible negative manifestations — a disgruntled critic, a separate one — cold and aloof, requires only deeds, «without lisping.» Position Beacons Individual: Leave me alone. I will do it myself. Asking you is more expensive. Let’s get down to business, no bullshit. You weren’t asked. And who asked you? If you want to do well, do it yourself.