Adult

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​​​​​​​Today, “being an Adult” is not fashionable. Under the influence of propaganda from many unfortunate psychologists, the concepts of “efficiency, include the head, reasonableness, big goals” are perceived as part of the dreary world of adulthood, excluding joy, lightness and cheerful laughter. The articles “The practice of smart reading for adults” and “How do you read the books you have chosen correctly?”, Where I tell what the adult attitude to reading will take, causes objections and protests among people.

Here is a typical letter: “Nikolai Ivanovich, and

​»The roles of Adult, Parent and Child are equally close to me. I agree that being only an Adult is a bit poor, while characterizing the world of Adulthood as “despondency and stuffiness” is strange to me, everything is more cheerful and brighter for me. Maybe because I am always an adult, and being a child is just a style, a shade for me, but not a content? I love music, it often sounds next to me and in my soul, but that I once went to listen to music by itself? Never. There is no need, no purpose, no interest. It is the same with “being a child” — I always do everything cheerfully, easily and cheerfully, like a child, but I am always in adult affairs, from morning to evening, 16 hours daily. And while those around my life envy, and not I them!

And now you can sort it out slowly …

Adulthood is not a passport, but the psychological age of a person, a certain level and type of personality development. Not every adult is an adult. Man-child — unfortunately, the type is familiar.

Many adult uncles and aunts are the same children and teenagers. Only already fat and bald. Some of them openly arrange a second childhood for themselves, someone secretly dreams about it …

What are the personality traits of an adult? Adulthood begins with independence, is enhanced by personal maturity and strengthened by mental health.

Neurotic personality and other manifestations of mental illness, unfortunately, quickly destroy the features of adulthood in quite adult people.

Adulthood, an adult person, is a special way of life, a special way of thinking and a style of speech.

An adult is a thinking person. This is not a common human trait. It is easier and more habitual to act thoughtlessly, impulsively.

An adult is guided by reason, not feelings. An adult is logic and realism, calm analysis and objective assessments of what is happening. A person, as an adult, is not interested in either fears or hopes: he weighs the pros and cons, considers the risks and makes the best decision given the information available.

Thought — did. Decided to do it.

The adulthood of a man is determined primarily by his responsibility, the adulthood of a woman is determined by her caring. In ancient Greece, for example, only one who planted and grew at least one olive tree was considered an adult. Thanks to this folk tradition, the country was covered with abundantly fruitful olive groves. In our culture, they say something similar: «A man should plant a tree, build a house and give birth to a son.» An adult person is one who provides for himself plus supports not only himself, but also his family, brings up children and supports parents. The criterion for the quality of adulthood and the meaning of adulthood is how warm and strong the family is, parents are protected, brought up and prepared for life, and children are happy.

An adult can be distinguished from a child not only by his way of thinking and lifestyle, by his actions and words, but also by his manner of holding and speaking — by his image. An adult person respects himself, behaves confidently and with dignity.

Adulthood has its own colors, its own shades. If people, adults only outwardly, who perform their adult duties out of need, in the role of a sufferer and a martyr. In contrast, an internally adult person chooses to be an adult, wants to be an adult, it is natural for him to be an adult — according to his soul, according to his inclination, according to his value orientation. Such an adult, internally mature person stops frantically looking for someone to rely on or someone to throw off responsibility — he voluntarily takes responsibility and is himself a support for himself and others.

At the same time, an adult does not necessarily look like a boring robot. The ability to timely use the necessary personal roles, including the roles of the Parent and the Child, is a completely adult trait. Playfulness, spontaneity, gaiety are childish qualities, but they may not interfere with adult decisions at all. Inner freedom is a worthy quality of a real adult.

adult education

In order for our children (and sometimes already quite adults) to become adults, it is important to notice situations in which children show independence/responsibility, create situations where independence/responsibility is possible and within their power, create situations where independence and responsibility are prestigious and become attractive , to create situations where independence/responsibility is obligatory and simply forced. See Adult Education