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Do you know this: it’s already two in the morning, and you are all tossing and turning in bed? Are you thinking about what you have to do tomorrow, or do you recall the stories of all your failures in a very inopportune way? Almost everyone has been in this situation. Psychotherapists tell you how to silence your brain and let you sleep.
It is known that evening and night are the times of day when anxiety is especially active in people prone to it. If right now we are stressed and feel that we can not cope with our own lives, then these feelings will intensify as soon as we are left alone with ourselves in the silence of the bedroom.
“Often during the day we are so busy that we simply do not have the opportunity to properly think about everything that worries us,” explains psychotherapist Shelly Tricher. “Our whole body is in fight or flight mode, so it can be extremely difficult for us to slow down and think.” But at night it turns out nowhere better for us, unfortunately.
“Another problem is that at night it is difficult to apply those anti-stress techniques that work during the day,” adds psychotherapist Christy Taylor. – The anxiety accumulated in our body is looking for a way out, and it is not easy to give it to her at night – just like trying to resort to rationalization. And here we are, hour after hour looking at the ceiling and chasing the same thoughts in a circle.
So what to do? Experts recommend several steps that are likely to alleviate your condition.
1. Get ready for bed
It is necessary to go to bed and get up at the same time every day, and also put all gadgets aside two hours before going to bed. You will do even better if you create a special spa-like atmosphere in the bedroom. To do this, you need to ventilate the room, turn on soothing music, do self-massage with aromatic oils – from the tips of your toes to the top of your head.
2. Recognize that you have anxiety
Instead of ignoring anxiety, Shelley Treacher advises recognizing that the experience lives in your body: “Learn where it is ‘located’ and what sensations and thoughts accompany it. Often the fear of some feeling, and not the feeling itself, prevents us from falling asleep.
3. Work on your breath
Meditation and the practice of deep breathing before bed can help reduce the intensity of passions, and in this case, anxiety. You can start with 10 deep inhales and exhales: inhale through your nose and exhale through your mouth, with maximum concentration on this process. If you can’t meditate on your own, try one of the many smartphone apps: Calm, Headspace, Insight Timer…
4. Do the exercise
Have you heard of the vagus nerve? This is a paired nerve that runs from the brain to the abdomen and helps reduce anxiety if you train it.
To do this, you need to sit or lie down more comfortably and turn your head to the right “all the way”. That is, until you can and feel comfortable. At the same time, the gaze should also be directed to the right and directed as far as possible. Stay in this position until you feel like yawning, inhaling deeply, or sighing, and then do the same on the left side.
5. Walk out your anxiety
If you still can’t fall asleep, then you need to get up, walk around the house and make yourself a warm drink without caffeine. According to Christy Taylor, switching from thinking to acting will lower the levels of stress hormones in your body. If you don’t feel like walking, you don’t have to – you can read, knit or do yoga.
6. Try to “Ground”
Does all of the above help you? Then do the grounding exercise. What it is: you need to touch five things, see four things, hear three sounds, smell two smells, and try one thing. Don’t forget Christy Taylor’s advice: “Do it slowly and mindfully. Feel the texture of the materials, carefully consider the object in front of you.
7. Analyze the past day
If you are kept awake by very specific thoughts about your failures, then it is worth making an “account” of everything that happened during the day. It may turn out that your brain is exaggerating and in reality everything is not so bad. In addition, it is worth writing down everything that bothers you – or at least three main reasons – and sketch out options for resolving situations. So you once again make sure that all issues are resolved and you have no reason not to sleep.
8. Tire yourself out
Have you ever watched a child struggling to stay awake? Surprisingly, his actions always backfire. “Do this: close your eyes slightly and then open them wide,” Treacher explains. – Again, close your eyelids about a quarter – and open again. Repeat several times, allowing the eyelids to close more and more until the eyes close completely. So you can probably outsmart and tire your body.
9. Be kind to yourself
Are you about to get up and can’t fall asleep? Have you tried meditation, done the exercise, drank some milk and still don’t sleep? The main thing is not to be angry and not to be annoyed with yourself. “Treat your anxiety with curiosity (it’s not just with us and protects us from something), but with compassion for yourself,” advises Shelley Treacher. “Perhaps, by examining your condition, you will calculate false attitudes, which it is high time to get rid of.”
If the above techniques were ineffective in combating night anxiety, then you should contact a therapist – he will figure out what is happening to you and offer options for solving your problem.