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You probably know such people – unbearable, loud, carried away exclusively by their own person, provoking conflicts, or even those who are afraid to turn their backs on. We try to avoid such people, both at work and at parties. Why do some of their features cause us special rejection?
1. They complain a lot
What to hide, we all sometimes sin with this, but the key word is “sometimes”. Unpleasant people complain constantly and for any reason. They don’t like the world or the people in it, and if you dig deeper, it turns out that they don’t like them too much either. True, it is impossible to sympathize with them on this occasion – their endless whining is too tiring.
2. They judge others ruthlessly.
They have a categorical view of what others do, how others think, look and behave. It is not difficult to guess from their sayings: they do not believe that everyone has the right to their opinion and, in general, to exist. What they don’t understand is that it’s not about others, it’s about themselves. Their opinion is only a projection, a reflection of their view of the world. However, it is useful for everyone, when criticizing others, to think that this criticism says something about us.
3. They deal with statements, not questions.
Pleasant people show their genuine interest to others by asking open-ended questions. Unpleasant interlocutors speak in statements, demonstrating narrow-mindedness. They do not listen, but simply wait for their turn to speak, to tell something about their loved ones.
4. They brawl people to make them easier to manage.
Relationships are ruined because of people like them. Instead of uniting and rallying people, they seek to quarrel them, set them against each other. Getting into a close friendship, they experience incredible satisfaction if they manage to destroy it. They can also steal a partner, so be on the lookout.
5. They brag all the time
They tend to throw dust in the eyes of others, flaunting important acquaintances and achievements, trying to look more successful and smart, falling in love with themselves more and more along the way.
6. They spread rumors
They “secretly” tell you something about others that you should not and do not want to hear. And you become very uncomfortable, including from the realization that, most likely, they are discussing you behind your back in the same way. Try to avoid such conversations.
7. They lack empathy
It is really difficult for them to “be in someone else’s shoes”, to look at the world through someone else’s eyes. Perhaps it’s their previous experiences, childhood trauma, or neglect by their parents. Already as adults, they experience feelings in much the same way as children, and they express them in the same way. It’s sad, but it’s still not easy to feel sympathy for them because of this.
8. They incite others
They perfectly understand how to hurt another, put pressure on his pain points. And therefore, often, knowing the opinion of the interlocutor on some issue, they take the opposite position. And when he takes the bait, they manage to make him fool or feel a burning sense of guilt.
9. They don’t keep their promises.
“I will definitely dial you”, “I will keep you informed”, “you can count on me” – as soon as these words break from their lips, they forget about their promises. You can never rely on them for anything. And when you know about it, then at least you understand that you can only rely on yourself.