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It is the first meeting that sets the vector for further communication. At the same time, often because of the excitement, it does not go very smoothly, and we fail to make the right impression. These psychological techniques will help you become more confident and win over any interlocutor. The main thing is to take some time to prepare.
Often the first impression determines how further relationships will develop. Fortunately, in order not to lose face, you just need to follow a few simple rules.
Try to learn more about the person
The more information you have about the interlocutor, the more likely you are to feel confident around him. Now, thanks to social networks, it is quite easy to find out what a person’s hobbies are, where he likes to relax and with whom he communicates. This can be done in advance if your future depends on the meeting (for example, if it is about meeting a potential boss).
Having this data, you will be able to touch on those topics that are most likely to interest the interlocutor. Thus, you will defuse the situation, as well as make it more comfortable and psychologically safe.
Pay attention to clothes
Of course, there is no need to copy the appearance of your counterpart, but if you dress in a style close to him, this will cause additional confidence. For example, for a meeting with a rock musician, you should not choose a business style. Conversely, if a person comes from the office with a strict dress code, it is better to wear a jacket.
Be polite
Most people are pleased to hear the interlocutor call their name. Therefore, call a person only as he introduced himself – without distortion. Even if the name is complex, it is important to remember it correctly and pronounce it from time to time, thereby referring not to the void, but directly to your counterpart.
Also, try to catch the moment when the person will be comfortable with your suggestion to change from a polite form of “you” to an informal “you”. It might be worth waiting for him to offer to do it himself.
Let the other person talk about themselves
At the first meeting, a person is not so much studying you as he is getting used to his own feelings, trying to understand how comfortable he is with you. You can take advantage of this.
Encourage your interlocutor to talk more about himself: let him talk about pleasant memories or professional successes. Thus, meeting with you will be associated with something joyful.
Do not skimp on kind words and compliments
Do not be greedy with them, but do not overdo it: compliments should reflect reality and sound sincere, not forced and hypocritical. When a person has implemented an idea that is really interesting for you, you can sincerely admire it.
If your interlocutor is a woman with a beautiful eye color, tell her about it. Or note the unusual pendant around her neck. True, this should be done only on the condition that you are of the same sex, as otherwise it may cause discomfort. People around us, as a rule, do not indulge us with compliments, so kind words are almost always pleasant.
“Mirror” the interlocutor
This method consists in discreetly reflecting the emotions, gestures and pace of the interlocutor’s speech. So you will find yourself on the same wavelength with him, which will cause even more confidence. If at the beginning of the meeting the person is tense, try to relax your own body – this will help to calm down your new acquaintance.
Let the interlocutor choose a seat
If at the first meeting you came to an unfamiliar space, give your partner the opportunity to choose a place that is convenient for him. He will probably be most comfortable where there is no movement behind him – so he can unconsciously control what is happening.
If the interlocutor gives you a choice, leave a more comfortable chair for him and take a chair for yourself. Try not to sit facing the interlocutor – it is better if you find yourself on the left or right. Don’t get too close, but don’t get too far either – let him figure out the distance.
Use active listening and make eye contact
Try to create a good mood for everyone present and, of course, do not forget about a smile. Maintain active listening during the dialogue. You can, for example, repeat the last phrase that the person said – this will make the interlocutor feel that you understand him.
Also, when communicating, try to maintain the following proportion: 80% of the time look into his eyes and 20% – to the side. For most people, this interaction is most comfortable.