You may think that you are a great friend, but are you really? Did others tell you about it or is it your subjective feeling? Be that as it may, people with whom many people like to be friends have certain traits. Do they belong to you?
Friendship is a mutually enriching process: helping others, supporting and encouraging them, sharing something and laughing together, we get a lot in return. It is not for nothing that high-quality social connections are considered one of the pillars on which mental health rests.
And yet, the majority communicate with friends not so often and deeply and spend time not as qualitatively as we would like, because life always makes adjustments to our plans. But that is why it is worth reminding yourself from time to time how important friendship is, and try to be a good friend to others.
So how do you know that you are such a friend? Go through the list below and see if you agree with all of the statements.
1. You remember what happens in the lives of your friends.
Birthdays, anniversaries, children’s names, favorite coffee brewing method, food preferences, parents’ health status – by remembering such information, we show others that they are truly interesting and important to us.
Be sure to keep memories not only of the time spent together, but also of what a friend lives and breathes now.
2. You don’t talk about them behind their backs.
Even in a positive way and with other close people – because it undermines the very foundations of friendship. Relationships should be built on trust and devotion, which means that it is unacceptable to both gossip about friends and silently listen to the conversations of others about them. You have to be honest with your friends. With whom, if not with them?
3. You get in touch for no reason
You write or call a friend simply because you are bored or have not heard or seen for a long time. Because you want to know how he or she is doing. Simply because you care.
4. It’s not scary to drop “armor” next to you
It’s easy to have fun together, but it’s much more difficult to be around someone truly vulnerable – crying, talking about your worries, guilt or shame. Next to a true friend, we are not afraid to open up, drop masks, talk about what is on our minds, and be ourselves.
5. You don’t judge or try to control them.
You are nonjudgmental about the decisions they make, career paths, who they associate with and how they live, and don’t try to “monopolize” your friends.
You know that everyone makes mistakes sometimes, and you accept people for who they are. And if a friend stumbles, always give him a hand without moralizing.
6. You are happy for them when they are doing well.
You are proud of your friends and their successes, and even if you sometimes experience pricks of envy, you do not allow them to poison the celebration of victory. You sincerely want your friends to succeed in their plans and reach new heights.
7. You have fun together
Often you laugh together until you drop, and, it would seem, for no reason. And after the meeting, both of you are always easier, better and happier than before.
8. You are near
You are the person you can always turn to for help or call in the middle of the night. Friends know they can always count on you. And, most importantly, they want to respond to you in the same way.