7 things you should stop doing instead of a child

Self-reliance is such a thing that cannot be grown from scratch.

“Oh my God, my head is empty. I forgot to put my social science notebook to Pavlik, ”my colleague lamented after listening to someone’s rebuke on the phone.

“How old is Pavlik?” – I ask out of politeness.

“Thirteen,” Marina replied proudly.

I’ll clarify: Pavlik is Marinin’s grandson. And yes, grandmother is collecting a schoolbag for the boy. Again, out of politeness, I did not say anything, but mentally stroked my daughter on the head, who was going to school on her own, starting from the first grade. And I thought: is it true, how many parents, grandparents literally blow off dust particles from their children, taking care of them almost before the wedding, or even after? It’s so tiring, and most importantly – pointless …

But seriously, where to start to bring up independence in children? Mom of four children Amy Carney made a list of seven items. Any child is able to do these things himself. Try it, he will definitely cope.

1. Get up in the morning

Yes, there are really few children among first-graders who are ready to jump on the alarm clock. But as soon as the child has passed from elementary school to middle school, that is, to the fifth grade, he can solemnly entrust this responsibility – to pull himself out of bed. In the morning you are already up to your throat: tidy yourself up, drink coffee.

However, some mothers say that they love to wake up their children – they are so cute, when they sleep, it is impossible not to crib. But here it is important to understand that motherhood is not only about affection. It is also a task to educate self-sufficient adults.

2. Prepare breakfast

And lunch too. The main task of parents is to make sure that there is, in principle, food in the house. If not, then bring home this very food. Perhaps with the help of a student. But the child can make scrambled eggs, cook pasta or even porridge (or porridge from pasta, it doesn’t matter). Think of yourself as a twelve year old. Were they able to?

In addition, some five or six more years, and your student will turn into a student, perhaps he will go to study in another city, and you will have no idea what your child eats there. Therefore, first of all, we should stop worrying too much now. Secondly – to teach the child to feed itself on its own.

3. Take care of health and hygiene

For example, a teenager is able to go and get tested in the morning on his own. Of course, you will have to go to specialists with him – until the age of majority, doctors cannot do anything with a child without parental consent. But he is already quite capable of doing some things without you.

By the way, from the age of 14, a child can already register at “State Services”, apply for a passport and do a lot of other useful things for himself.

Well, and about brushing your teeth, showers in the morning and in the evening, cutting your nails at this age, it’s already a shame to remind you. But if these procedures have not yet turned into reflexes, then it’s time to spur the process.

4. Getting ready for school

Not even discussed. And you don’t need to run back and forth to bring the child a notebook forgotten at home, a textbook or a sports uniform. Didn’t take it? It’s my own fault, I had to get ready, and not sit with my head on the phone. Today I forgot, I got a stick from the teacher, next time, you see, it will be more attentive. In addition, serfdom was abolished long ago, and the child has not yet earned money for a servant. In general, learning through pain. Very effective.

5. Plan your time

And not only his own, but also someone else’s. “Maaam, I have to hand over my essay tomorrow, can you print it out?” – It is not very pleasant to receive such a message when you finally go home after a day full of confusion. Come back? That’s really a pipe. Let him warn in advance next time. Abstracts are not asked the night before. And they don’t ask to bring plasticine, Whatman paper and the like at nine in the evening to school the next day. The child must learn to think about your convenience too.

6. Watch your clothes

“Maaam, haven’t you washed my uniform?” No. Does the machine shock you? Or you don’t remember the password for the box with the detergent? Anyway, why should I remember about your clothes? Even a baby is able to bring it to the washing machine. In the end, you can ask to wash. But you shouldn’t think that I am such a personal laundress who has no other business but to look after their socks and T-shirts.

7. Do your homework

If he asks for help in understanding something, then, of course, you need to help. But sitting next to and vigilantly watching if the child is doing homework is not worth it. Well, seriously, this is his job. And you – we will repeat for the tenth time – have your own things to do. Therefore, it is not worth doing the work for the child. This is the thing with which he not only can, but must cope himself. And to be responsible for the result of their labors too.

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