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If you could pass on only one quality to your children, what would it be? Perhaps it could be the strength of the spirit. And that’s why.
Falls and failures, failures and disappointments – we all face them in one way or another throughout our lives. It is emotional strength that helps you stay steadfast, rise from your knees and persevere in the direction of your goal, no matter what.
It also helps in communicating with colleagues and romantic partners, friends and relatives, those who want to seriously harm us or just hurt us more. Finally, thanks to her, we learn to manage ourselves, our impulses and emotions.
This strength is manifested in the ability to withstand an unpleasant experience, without closing and suppressing emotions, to go towards a dream, despite the strongest fears. Of course, we all had a different “start”: some were lucky to be born with a strong nervous system, in a loving family and grow up in a supportive environment, others were not. Fate has been kind to some of us, harsh to others.
The good news is that fortitude is a quality that everyone can develop in themselves, regardless of past experience. Although it would be more accurate to say “work out”, because this is a life-long process.
What distinguishes people who are as close as possible to this state?
1. They question their own thoughts.
Mentally strong people know that the mind often plays with us, trapping us, and therefore they learn to properly deal with intrusive and negative thoughts. They don’t believe everything their mind says (much less their picky inner critic), and they don’t torment themselves with constant ruminating over past and potential events.
They have learned to mentally take a step back in tense moments and look at themselves and the situation from the side, in order to ultimately make informed decisions.
2. They trust their gut, but don’t follow their emotions.
The ability to listen to oneself, not to go into a state of passion from emotions – that’s what else distinguishes such people. This is because they have learned to control themselves and take responsibility for their behavior. When making decisions, they listen to both the voice of reason and feelings.
3. They are highly stress resistant
Quality, absolutely indispensable in our crazy world. By the way a person behaves in a state of uncertainty and in a stressful situation, it is easy to understand whether he has the strength of mind or not.
4. They don’t take criticism personally.
Such a person has an internal locus of control. So, he believes that he has the power to influence what happens to him. At the same time, he does not engage in self-flagellation and perceives criticism as feedback, as an assessment of his actions, and not of what he is.
5. They are able to help themselves.
Such people know how to bring themselves to their senses without outside help. Deal with difficult situations, thoughts, or emotions without running away, without shutting themselves off from others, but also without hoping that they will solve all their problems. They have the resource to both calm down, take care of themselves, and show empathy for others.
6. They don’t compare themselves to others.
And do not allow others to decide for them what to be and what to do. They don’t use others to make themselves feel better. If they compare themselves, then only with themselves, and try to be a little better today than yesterday.
7. They are able to both engage and let go.
Finally, emotionally strong people have a unique ability to show up where they are needed at the right time and at least try to make the world a little better. And at the same time take a step back to see the whole picture. They often ask themselves the question: will it matter in 5 days? 5 months? 5 years? And, if the answer is no, just let go of the situation.