Contents
- 1. How he keeps his word
- 2. How he communicates with people whose status is lower
- 3. What does his car look like?
- 4. How he behaves if he makes a mistake
- 5. How does he react if you make a mistake
- 6. How he behaves with people from whom he needs something
- 7. How does his real life compare to what he shows on social media?
To accurately determine who is in front of us, what kind of character a person has and what to expect from him is a skill that could greatly help us in life. Here are a few things to look out for in order to know what a partner or acquaintance is.
1. How he keeps his word
Every day we all promise something to others: “I’ll let you know by Friday”, “I’ll be there in five minutes”, “I’ll call you after seven”. And we do not always fulfill our obligations, because life is unpredictable and not everything can be controlled and predicted.
However, if a person regularly breaks promises made to them, this can be regarded as a bad sign – he is unreliable, does not manage his life very well, or does not consider you important enough for him to make any efforts.
2. How he communicates with people whose status is lower
This is, in general, a fairly well-known tip – to pay attention to how your friend behaves with a flight attendant, waiter and other staff. It is much more important to observe his communication with those who cannot be of any use to him. Strangers on the street, watchmen, flower sellers, homeless people – how does your friend or partner communicate with them? What does he say behind their back? This can tell a lot about him.
3. What does his car look like?
This, of course, is not about the brand or cost of the car, but about how neat it looks from the outside and what is happening in the cabin. And if you look in the glove box or rummage under the seats?
In Insight, sociologist Malcolm Gladwell shares the results of a study in which 80 students were rated by their closest friends and strangers who spent just 15 minutes in the subjects’ bedroom. It turned out that strangers gave more accurate estimates than close friends.
Of course, getting into a person’s house is not so easy (maybe it’s for the best!). But the next time he gives you a lift, pay attention to the interior of the car. If you look closely, it will reveal a lot about the habits and personality of its owner.
4. How he behaves if he makes a mistake
If you point out a mistake to a friend – gently, politely and respectfully – how does he behave? Begins to apologize? Tries to deny everything? Protected? Explains how it happened? Silent? Tries to accuse you of just being picky? Reminds you of your failures?
A person is known not in happiness, but in trouble – in situations where something goes wrong, during conflicts and disagreements. No relationship is complete without them, so it’s best to find out who you’re dealing with as early as possible.
5. How does he react if you make a mistake
After apologizing for what you did wrong, what do you hear in response? Words of support? Accusations? Injections in the spirit of “you always …”, “you never …”? If a person’s reaction confuses and upsets you, it’s not that he is “bad”. Perhaps he was brought up that way and he simply does not know how to do otherwise. But whether or not to teach him how to “should” is up to you.
6. How he behaves with people from whom he needs something
Some seem to suffer from a “split personality”: for example, a man can be charming, sweet and affable with an attractive woman, but arrogant with his colleagues and subordinates. The fact is that such people have problems with a sense of their own “I” and change dramatically depending on who they come into contact with.
Does your companion try to “show off” certain people? Does he flatter those who are higher up the social ladder, while neglecting those who are a few rungs below? Pay attention to such signs.
If your friend is obsessed with how he looks on social networks, then he is generally too dependent on the opinions of others. Perhaps this forces him to carefully calculate who to make acquaintances with and what to do in order to gain approval and recognition.
What does such an “obsession” look like? A sure sign is that a person tries to present everything that happens to him as something grandiose and “sticks out” any, even the most insignificant detail of his everyday life.
Let us remind you once again: all these signs are not listed at all in order to begin to evaluate and condemn other people. In addition, if you noted one or two traits in a friend, this may not mean anything – after all, none of us is perfect. Just try to understand how your fundamental values, views and attitude to life coincide.
