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Due to constant busyness, our communication with others often comes down to meaningless conversations “about nothing”. We do not have the time or energy for more serious and meaningful conversations that could help us better understand ourselves and our loved ones.
Truly deep questions and conversations require genuine curiosity and a desire to connect emotionally. “The shortest route to another person’s heart or mind is through meaningful, meaningful dialogue. By asking important and deep questions, you demonstrate sincere interest in the interlocutor and create the prerequisites for further rapprochement, ”explains psychotherapist Holly Richmond.
Here are 60 such questions. Of course, you can add to this list by creating your own.
What to ask yourself
- What are my true intentions?
- What are my core values?
- What secret desires and aspirations have I used to ignore?
- Who are the people with whom communication always cheers me up?
- Who, on the contrary, always seems to draw energy from me?
- At what moments do I most acutely feel alive?
- What do I feel now (anxiety, joyful anticipation, emotional excitement, thirst for action…) and why?
- Am I taking good care of myself?
- Do I value myself?
- What am I not paying enough attention to?
- What has been my personal growth?
What to ask your friends
- What are you thinking about today?
- What are you most interested in right now?
- Is something bothering you lately?
- Do you feel connected to the outside world?
- What is especially important and interesting for you?
- What do you value most in friends?
- What always makes you happy?
- What are the difficulties in your life right now?
- Maybe you want to talk about something? Perhaps I can offer some advice?
- What gives you pleasure now?
- Are you working on something interesting right now?
What to ask your partner
- What do you feel most often lately?
- Do you think we’re close enough?
- Are you satisfied with sex?
- How can we make our relationship even better?
- When do you feel especially loved/loved?
- Is there something so important to you that you would risk your life for it?
- How can I become a better partner?
- What/what were you like as a child? What about in adolescence?
- When was the last time you felt lonely even though we were together?
- What do you dream about?
- When do you think you and I are especially close?
- Is there anything that is bothering you that I could help with?
- How do you imagine a truly great relationship?
What to ask relatives
- What are you especially interested in today?
- What are you grateful for today?
- What did you miss this week?
- Did you manage to do something this week that you are proud of?
- What do you want to learn in the near future?
- What word would you use to describe our family?
- Do you feel like a full-fledged member of the family, or rather, an outsider?
- What family traditions are you trying to keep?
- Have you ever done something “forbidden” that was worth it?
- Tell me about our relatives that I don’t know?
- What are the strengths of our family?
- Tell me about the best gift you have ever received?
- What are the main values in our family?
- What traditions were you glad to give up?
- How do you imagine our family in 50 years?
A few more philosophical questions to start an interesting conversation
- What is the meaning of life for you?
- What do you think will be your memory?
- How long do you think you will be remembered?
- What is the most important thing you have done in your life?
- How did you manage to change the world even a little?
- What is the most important quality for any person?
- What in the world should become more?
- What in the world should become less?
- What do you think will be more valued in 50 years: science or art?
- Why do you consider art important (or vice versa, useless)?
- Do you think the influence of religions will increase or decrease?
- What is happiness?
- What do you consider more important and why: improve your own life, help your family, or make the world a better place?
- By what criteria should society be judged?
- Is the world changing for the better or for the worse? And why?
- Do you have a motto or main life principle?
- Are moral principles relative or absolute?
- What is worth keeping from the past?
- How has society changed during your lifetime?
- What do you think are the reasons for these changes?
- Is it better to be a realist or an optimist?
“It is always useful to have in your “arsenal” a set of important and interesting questions that can start an interesting dialogue. Such questions help to better know others and yourself and strengthen relationships with loved ones,” emphasizes Holly Richmond.