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Most of us want to be happy, but on the way to this dream, alas, we make the same mistakes. Yes, and life sometimes makes its own adjustments to our plans: divorces and illnesses, layoffs and losses happen to us. How to be?
Buying expensive things, vacationing in prestigious places, relationships for the sake of relationships, alcohol and gambling — all this does not make us happy, at least in the long run. Perhaps the main secret of happiness is in the right attitude towards life. In the ability to always, in any most difficult circumstances, remind yourself: yes, it’s not easy now, but it won’t last forever. Or, as Henry Ford said, “When the whole world seems to be against you, remember that the plane takes off against the wind.”
It was this phrase that once helped screenwriter and director Simon Gucher to reconsider his attitude to life. At the age of 20, Gacheru, suffering from peripheral facial paralysis, was thinking about suicide: his own future was so gloomy. Over the past year, the young man painfully parted with his loved ones twice, and it seemed that it would only get worse.
At the same time, Gacheru’s mother was admitted to the hospital. According to doctors, she was just lucky: a little more — and she would not have been saved. Doctors diagnosed the woman with diabetes. In the same year, the young man’s father died — not just a close person, but also an example to follow. The situation seemed completely hopeless, there was no one to talk about what was happening. It seemed that life was not worth fighting for it …
Looking ahead, let’s say that this story has a happy ending: Gacheru not only managed, but also realized himself in the profession and is quite happy in life. And he formulated the rules that then, ten years ago, helped him to survive. So, maybe they can help you too.
1. Accept what is out of your control
The first step on the path to happiness is to acknowledge what is happening to you right now. To face the truth, even if it is about loss and it hurts a lot. It is important to stop deceiving yourself, to entertain illusions and finally accept the fact that nothing depends on you anymore. This is not about powerlessness, but about the rejection of self-deception.
2. Change what you can while you can
If there is anything you can do to change the situation, do it. According to Gacheru, his relationships broke down because he did not invest enough in them, and when he realized this, it was too late to fix anything.
3. Look deep into yourself
Many of us make the same mistake: we expect others to make us happy — parents, children, loved one, environment. In fact, deep down we know what can give us joy and return the pleasure of life, we just need to stop and think about it.
And, even if “the light is not nice”, it is important to remember everything that has ever brought us joy and start doing it again. Time after time, step by step, spending more time alone with yourself and your desires.
4. Surround yourself with people you are happy with.
Those who support you, who care about you, who believe in you. With them, you will not only feel better «in the moment» — it will also affect your overall sense of satisfaction from life.
5. Try new activities
Find something that makes your heart beat faster, that will captivate you and bring joy. Remember what you did before — perhaps even as a child, or try everything in a row until you find «the one.»
6. Look for new solutions
In life, there are indeed difficult situations and difficult events, but do not allow yourself to get stuck in the trap of negative feelings and thoughts. Try to change everything. Talk to others, ask about their experiences, read, listen to other people’s stories, seek advice, don’t neglect the opportunity to get professional help. Sooner or later, the “door”, most likely, will be found.
Simon Gacheru found salvation in his hobby: despite his illness, he began to travel a lot, take pictures and shoot videos. These activities took possession of him so much that gradually the pain began to recede. And, despite the fact that in life to this day there are difficulties, most of the time he can call himself a happy person.
He succeeded, and so can you. Even if it is not easy right now, do not let circumstances deprive you of the ability to enjoy life.