You have to work on relationships, but you also want to enjoy them! How to create a union in which there will be not only work, but also pleasure?
The fact is that in any relationship sooner or later patterns of behavior are established. We react in the same way to the partner’s words, we present the same, in fact, claims to him. These habits greatly affect our communication with a loved one. In some cases, they even become the foundation of relationships, but if you want variety, freshness of feelings, you should definitely get rid of these patterns.
How to enjoy relationships
1. Learn empathy. The ability to empathize with your partner will help negate the harmful effects of stress. Every day we face problems at work, with children, with parents, with friends – with other external factors that also affect relationships.
But when we support each other, sincerely sympathize, care, listen and hear, we save each other from difficult emotions, even in the difficult situation of a pandemic, says psychotherapist Ronda Balzarini.
2. Use your phone for good. Agree that the habit of constantly holding a smartphone in your hands can be a big problem for relationships. They send you messages, write on social networks, you view product advertisements and videos on Youtube.
But when people are constantly on the phone, they deprive their partner of attention. And that can be a big problem. But did you know that the phone can work for relationships, and not just against them? Write love declarations to each other, send compliments, share funny photos and stories. Your partner will definitely love it.
3. Strengthen mental flexibility. Claiming, demanding, but doing nothing is easy. It is much more difficult, but much more useful to treat a partner loyally and gently. Become psychologically more flexible, open, understanding. To delve into the circumstances, to consider the situation in context, in a word – to try to look at everything from the positive side. Fortunately, mental flexibility can be developed.
4. Look at each other in a new way. When was the last time you had a one-on-one conversation with your partner? Discussed your fears, hopes, remembered the past? If you are tired of having the same boring conversations about food, salary, repairs every day, try to set aside time for a heart-to-heart conversation.
Psychologist Arthur Aron argues that couples who have heart-to-heart conversations more often than others maintain a sense of closeness longer and are better able to compromise in everyday matters. Fall in love with each other again and again, asking personal questions, asking for advice, sharing your innermost.
5. Remember. Everyone has difficult times. Sometimes we live day after day, drowning in routine affairs and problems. But even if it’s hard now, you can remember funny moments from the joint past. After all, those couples who are able to laugh together are more satisfied with relationships and solve complex problems more easily.
So there is a great reason to delve into memories, and when you need to refresh your feelings or make your partner laugh, recall a funny incident from the past.
6. Thank each other. In a relationship, every little thing matters. Therefore, thank each other for everything: for support, for signs of attention, for love, for care. Did your partner make you coffee in the morning, let you sleep longer, complimented you, gave you flowers for no reason? Say “thank you”, show how much it means to you. Believe me, this will only make your love stronger.
Relationships are not a monolith. They are constantly changing as we ourselves are changing. Therefore, give up what no longer works, make new habits and traditions, enjoy each other, and not just pull the strap together.