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You do not need to wait for gifts of fate to become happy. We can experience a surge of happiness at any moment – and scientists have found out what will help us with this.
Satisfaction with life and a subjective feeling of happiness are categories that, it would seem, do not always depend on us: people sometimes exaggerate the significance of their failures, believing that they are now unlucky or have a black streak. Meanwhile, there are many simple ways to feel happier than a minute ago. These are not just general words: the mechanisms that are involved in them are revealed and described in studies conducted by psychologists.
Send a thank you letter
Gratitude is a feeling that allows us to enjoy what we have at our disposal. If we have something for which we can be grateful to other people, then life is no longer hopeless. Send a message (SMS, email or any other message) to a loved one, listing everything you can say thank you for.
To the one you are in love with – for happy moments spent together, and if you are married – for common children and many years of a happy marriage. To your parents for teaching you to believe in yourself, to your friends for their support.
Those who often experience gratitude feel, on average, 25% happier than everyone else.
A study conducted by scientists at the University of Kent (USA) found that just one letter a week is enough to feel happier and more satisfied with life. The experiment, which involved 219 people, showed that letters of gratitude also reduce the severity of symptoms of depression.
In the Thank You! Professor of Psychology at the University of California (USA) Robert Emmons measured the share of happiness that brings us the expression of gratitude to other people. Those who experience this emotion frequently feel, on average, 25% happier than everyone else. The professor obtained this result by analyzing the subjective feelings of life in a control group of volunteers who wrote weekly (for 10 weeks) notes mentioning what they are grateful to other people for.
Remember 3 good things that happened today
Even if you think that you have achieved everything yourself and you have nothing to be grateful to others for, you can feel a surge of happiness by saying “thank you” to chance or fate. Take a few minutes to remember three good things that happened to you today.
First you will look for big events – no, a distant relative did not leave me a million; No, I didn’t get promoted…
This method develops the habit of appreciating small pleasures, quietly restructuring attitude towards life.
And then remember that in the morning you went out into the street in a bad mood – but saw that the sun was shining, and smiled. And a colleague who had not noticed you before suddenly smiled at you and said hello for the first time. And yet, having returned home, you managed to right in time for the beginning of a new episode of your favorite series. This method develops the habit of appreciating small joys, subtly reshaping the attitude towards life.
A study conducted by the founder of positive psychology, Martin Seligman, showed that this exercise gives a long-term (up to six months) positive effect.
Spend money on someone else
It’s nice if someone unexpectedly solves your financial problems. However, if you yourself spend money on another person, this can bring you even more happiness.
As part of an experiment conducted by a team of American psychologists, volunteers were given small amounts – from 5 to 20 dollars, offering to use them at their discretion: spend on themselves, buy something for others, or donate to charity. It was found that the feelings of the “unmercenaries” who spent money on others turned out to be much better than those of the “egoists” who chose their loved ones as recipients of the beneficence.
Manifestations of generosity appear in many rituals noted by ethnologists among various peoples of the world.
Serving an old woman on the subway or paying for a colleague’s breakfast in the cafeteria, you present several “gifts” to your own psyche – you begin to relate better to the people around you, increase your self-confidence and feel a closer connection with society.
Generosity (often even excessive) appears in many rituals noted by ethnologists among various peoples of the world – we recall the potlatch holiday among the North American Indians, when the leader of the tribe and his guests try to outdo each other in the wealth of gifts given to each other.
surrender to dreams
Maybe building castles in the air is a waste of time, but if you think about the very real possibilities, this is another way to feel happier.
To paraphrase Hippocrates, one could say: we are what we expect. A series of five experiments conducted by researchers at the University of Colorado at Boulder showed that when thinking about events that may happen in the future, people experience almost as strong emotions as if these events were happening right now.
The more detailed our dreams, the more convincing visual images they contain, the more complete the emerging feeling of happiness.
These emotions, for example, are much stronger than the sensations that a person has when remembering past events – even very joyful or, conversely, very sad ones. Dreaming about visiting friends, participating in a holiday or a trip to a country where we have long wanted to visit, we imperceptibly program ourselves for a positive perception of our life – and the more detailed our dreams, the more compelling visual images they contain, the fuller the feeling of happiness that arises.
The joy of life is even greater for those who make plans with friends – the study even estimated the monetary equivalent of this opportunity: to get the same amount of happiness that you get in the process of regularly discussing plans for the future with friends, you need to earn a year an additional $130. You can buy an apartment.
Get into a job you’re good at
This method is better than others saves from the feeling of routine. Have you heard praise from others regarding your professional skills for a long time? It’s no wonder if you don’t consider what you do to be your life’s work. Think of an activity where you’re really talented—maybe you’re writing amazing poetry, you’re good at hitting XNUMX-pointers in a basketball basket, or you’re good at talking to older people.
Hobbies are not just a pleasant way to spend time. This is an opportunity to gain self-confidence and satisfaction in life, as a recent study proves: doing what you love not only allows you to relieve stress and get rid of fatigue, but also becomes an important factor that affects our perception of how our existence meets those ideal criteria, which we ask ourselves.