In the age of the sexual revolution, gadgets and social networks, it has become more difficult to distinguish fake romance from real feelings, and serious intentions from another attempt to assert oneself. We are more attentive than ever before to everyone who enters our lives. How have relations changed and why have we become afraid of them?
1. Modern relationships are scary because it’s impossible to distance yourself from someone you once loved. You are struggling to move on, telling yourself that you can live without a person, but the former partner is always looking at you from the screen of a laptop, phone or tablet. Even if you try to erase all traces of his existence, there is someone who posts an old photo on Facebook that evokes the old experiences.
It is very difficult to completely disengage from someone – and it seems that no one wants to do this. Exes can write out of nowhere just when you have almost established a personal life. It destroys everything you’ve done to get rid of the heartache. You may feel the presence of an ex all the time, even if you have made it clear that this stage has long passed.
2. Modern relationships are scary because they have a million different types. Serious, open, “almost relationships”, casual relationships, texting, relationships without commitment… Even though there are more types than ever before, no one really wants to characterize relationships. Everyone avoids labels, even if it may jeopardize further communication. Certainty began to frighten people. One frank conversation could solve everything, it could clear up all the mixed signals, but these dialogues rarely happen.
3. Modern relationships are scary because it has become very easy to cheat. You can download the dating app and browse the options on the couch while sitting at your desk next to your partner in your bedroom. You can send pictures that will be deleted automatically, erasing any evidence of infidelity. You can flirt with someone using social media with impunity, you can build an inappropriate connection without realizing what exactly is going on. You can lose a loved one without even noticing how it happened.
4. Modern relationships are scary because everyone sees your love unfold. Looking at the photos you post, people either get very happy for you or roll their eyes. They leave nasty comments about how long your relationship will last. And if a gap occurs, it does not go unnoticed. Everyone pays attention to the fact that you have deleted joint photos from your profile. It is terrible to realize that everyone on your list of friends knows whether you are single, in a committed relationship, or regularly change partners. Each follower forms their own opinion about your love affairs, even if you don’t know each other personally. Your relationship ceases to be your private affair and becomes a public domain.
5. Modern relationships are scary because they are a breeding ground for painful breakups. Relationships may end without warning. They may end up with a partner text message or your message, which will remain unanswered. Without a face-to-face conversation, most wounds remain wide open. It’s hard to come to terms with losing someone when you have no idea what you did to scare the person away. Parting by SMS has become as commonplace as going to the store for bread.
Source: thoughtcatalog.com