5 obstacles to success and how to overcome them?

We want to start something, but we delay the start again and again. Why? Sometimes someone nearby doubts our strength, the correctness of the idea. “Why do you need a second higher education: this is an extra waste of money and you will not be at home. But what about the children? – the husband says to his wife dreaming of self-realization. Or he himself is tired of hired work and wants to start his own business, and the family is not sure of success.

And sometimes we doubt ourselves. “I don’t have enough knowledge”, “I’m not experienced enough for this”, “I don’t have the strength and energy.” How to recognize these internal and external provocateurs who got in the way of a dream? And are they always so wrong? Business coach Oleg Dobroshtan offers practical advice.

Obstacle #1: Fear of Not Getting Things Done

There is a primary fear: “I have never done this, and since I have not done this, then I don’t have such experience, which means it won’t work out.” Vicious circle. Any new project is a leap of faith. Therefore, it makes no sense to avoid fear, because the truth may not work out.

Another thing is that the criteria for this “failure” should be clear. How do I know what didn’t work for me? Have I not reached some indicators, quite tangible things or a state of mind? And if we consider our leap of faith as a movement from zero? Then there will definitely be some result for which you should praise yourself.

Antidote. Specify your fear: what actions will you need to take to launch a project, whether it be a business or a move? What funds will be required, own or borrowed? Google to help us: there are calculation templates, forums of those who have already tested a similar idea in experience.

Sometimes fear is a useful signal. I ran my gym idea through a calculator once and came to the conclusion that the project would be unprofitable.

Obstacle number 2: the main thing is to believe in a dream

It’s actually better not to rely on the call “Follow your dream and everything will work out”. Blind faith is just as dangerous as total fear of failure. This is its reverse side. Of 100% of startups, about 10% survive a year after the start, and only 2-3% succeed.

To get into these percentages, you should not leave the race ahead of time. My friend, for example, launched an online electrical equipment store, and in the first quarter they bought only brushes for some kind of unit for 1500 rubles. If he had not been ready for this, he would have abandoned the idea in the first month.

You should not rush headlong into a new relationship, business, moving to another country without collecting information about the pitfalls.

Antidote. It is worth preparing a backup plan: how to act if it does not work out – or it will work out, but not immediately. And what to do as new information about our dream appears – how we use it for our own benefit, soberly assessing the situation and taking the necessary actions.

For example, after moving to another country, how will we manage without friends? We need to find new friends first. It is also worth checking how realistic and interesting the idea is. Now, the more creative it is – other things being equal (for example, a cool team and a competent business plan), the more chances for success and investment.

This is not only about business, but also about relationships: what can I offer a potential partner so that he chooses me from all the dating site and is ready to invest in me emotionally and financially? And then – persistently and systematically achieve your goals.

Obstacle number 3: relatives do not support, well, let me handle it myself

Even if it seems that this is exclusively our project and it concerns only us, this is a myth. Any innovation in the life of one member of the family or team will inevitably affect everyone. We were going to study a foreign language, get another higher education or bought a subscription to a fitness club.

This means that some of the time, emotions and attention will be switched to something else than before. Especially when it comes to business (it, as a rule, takes away the maximum of what we have from the above).

If the family, people dear to us, are against it, there is no need to build illusions that this situation can be circumvented without discussing it with relatives in advance. You can, of course, put everyone before the fact. But are we ready for the fact that soon we will be met at home as an enemy?

Antidote. Be sure to enlist the support of those who influence you (partners in life and business, bosses, friends). Talk to all family members and stakeholders, identify everyone’s needs and fears, and neutralize them with care. How? Direct conversation.

Because the unknown scares us. There is something that we are used to and are waiting for by default. For example, that we will continue to come for family dinners on Saturdays. Or go fishing “with the boys.”

Now everything will change, it is worth warning about this, discussing the distribution of responsibilities: who will now take the child to kindergarten, buy groceries. What if the family is against it anyway? It’s always a matter of communication.

Look for the right arguments and tone to be heard and supported.

Obstacle #4: Acting Out Unresolved Old Issues Through Change

It may turn out that it is not the passionate idea of ​​​​creating something new that moves us to change, but the unresolved problems from which we run. That we may be playing out old scenarios by trying to create something different.

But after all, we ourselves enter this new unchanged, which means that the probability of rake dances is very high. Even if the goal seems right, it is worth making sure at the start again: are we sure we are not solving one problem by creating another?

Antidote. It may happen that after psychotherapy, the previously hated position of an accountant turns out to be a great job, and you do not have to become an actor at the age of 40, catching up with a youthful dream. What used to be annoying, after therapy may well bring joy – including due to a change in focus.

For example, we had a difficult relationship with dad or mom. And we (that’s strange!) Constantly choose for ourselves such a company or such a boss, where we will confirm the usual model, seeing in the boss a dictator dad or a controlling mom.

We will learn about this in consultations, go through therapy and begin to build relationships with management in a new way: not as a parent-child, but as two adults, and no longer need to run away to a new company or profession.

And even more so, you don’t need to freeze your ears to spite your mother, proving that you can create your own business against all odds. Sometimes it’s cheaper to deal with your dragons than to clean up the rubble from a design that seemed to be saving.

Obstacle number 5: not enough energy and strength

Any new business should be entered mentally and physically healthy. The first year is the most difficult: there is a restructuring of old patterns, the creation of new connections, acquaintances, the development of skills, the expansion of one’s own boundaries.

The body is both mentally and physically hard. Stress is inevitable. And it’s a pity if the built plan collapses because we didn’t prepare the body for stress.

Antidote. A business or a new life project (renovation, wedding, children) requires physical strength. Perform scheduled body maintenance. Why, before a long trip by car, do we prepare it, but not ourselves?

Add resources to yourself – for this it is worth not only visiting doctors, but also mastering mental self-regulation techniques that affect “physics”: meditation, for example. Sleep is necessary for productivity: it is a myth that the less we sleep, the more we get done, just the opposite.

As well as another myth that food is a secondary matter. Therefore, it’s time to give up what is not food – chips, snacks, soda.

Take care of proper nutrition (balance of proteins, fats and carbohydrates). Ideally, connect a nutritionist or nutritionist who will help you adjust the diet and regimen so that it gives, and does not take away energy.

No time to reheat and cook? Arrange for a child to heat up your meal with a sense of self-importance for the family business, or a retired mom who is just waiting to help.

No time for the gym? Use video tutorials and short workouts. It does not require a lot of time, but it gives a lot of energy.