What do children need to cope with the complexities and uncertainties of adulthood? Physical activity, healthy sleep, the ability to enjoy life … But not only that. Here are five skills and habits that will help your child become happier.
1. Live consciously
Today it is difficult to find a person who has not heard about awareness. This technique of total presence in the present moment has been recognized as one of the most effective recipes for a happy life.
There is a common misconception that mindfulness can only be learned through special courses. But to put it quite simply, awareness is the full awareness of the world around you and your own feelings.
Activities like watching TV or surfing the Internet are certainly not suitable. But you can walk or wash dishes in a state of awareness. And this skill should be taught to children.
The easiest way is to start walking again
I’m talking specifically about walking without a specific purpose, when you can stop to enjoy the sight of a beautiful flower, while consciously paying attention to all the senses.
Children after a certain age may be too late to accustom to walks. For example, my four-year-old son is always enthusiastic about such proposals, but teenagers usually answer: “No, thanks.”
Interestingly, there is a direct relationship between how much a child walked in early childhood and how much he likes to walk in adolescence.
2. Learn
The most important feature of a happy person is the ability to learn new things. Learning refreshes life and satisfies basic psychological needs. We are sure that our children are already learning – they spend most of their time at school. However, if they study passively and without interest, they are unlikely to receive psychological benefits from this.
And what did they like to study lately? Maybe it was playing a musical instrument? Or did they learn something new and interesting from a book, a TV program, a heated discussion?
Can you study with them? You can try something new or introduce them to your old hobby.
Come up with a task that you can complete together
By learning something new, you will not only strengthen family relationships, but also show your children that you can learn anywhere, at any time and at any age.
3. Use your strengths
It’s only when we do what we’re good at that we can truly experience what it’s like to be ourselves. Knowing our abilities and talents, we open the shortest path to personal and professional self-realization. By tapping into our strengths and talents every day, we move closer to happiness and fight the symptoms of depression.
To find out your strengths, take a special test. Build a family tree, outlining the strengths of each family member, using drawings, collages, cards.
Be sure to notice the manifestations of the talents of children in everyday life. When I see my son doing crazy jumps on his BMX, I say, “I see you put your sense of adventure to good use.”
4. View from different angles
Do you prefer to think that the glass is half empty or half full? Are you looking for pluses in everything or do you see flaws everywhere? It’s rare that something is entirely good or bad, but it’s much more beneficial to focus on the good rather than the bad.
Every time something bad happens, ask yourself, “Is there something good here?” and “What does this teach us?” By observing this kind of constructive thinking in parents, children will learn to look at what is happening from different angles – and this is an essential skill for preventing depression in the future.
I have never met a parent who would like his children to grow up selfish. Kindness and generosity are appreciated always and everywhere. However, phrases like “be good” are clearly not enough for your child, especially a teenager, to grow up that way.
Generosity can be taught and learned, and, as always, it is much better to learn it in practice than in theory.
Arrange with the children and make a pleasant surprise for a family friend or even a stranger. Get involved in volunteering together.
Research has shown that altruistic behavior activates the pleasure centers in the brain – apparently, nature has programmed us to enjoy helping each other. The mutual benefit is obvious – helping others makes us feel better.