5 good reasons to adopt positive education

 

Emotions impact the brain

Since the 70s, neuroscience has only studied the cognitive and intellectual functions of the brain. In the XNUMXst century, “affective and social neuroscience” emerged, which studies the brain mechanisms of emotions, feelings and social relationships. It is thanks to this brand new scientific discipline that we finally discovered the impact of education on the development of the brain of a young child. It was about time, because these discoveries are absolutely crucial.

Indeed, between the age of 0 to 2 years, two million cerebral connections are created in the brain of a child every minute, depending on the experiences he has. Then a sorting is carried out, the “useless” connections are removed and the brain becomes operational. During these early years, the maturation of a child’s brain is greatly influenced by his emotional state, which depends on the attitude of adults towards him. Full of studies guide us.

An ultra-sensitive brain to stress

Fear, threat, danger stimulate a structure called the cerebral amygdala: it is this which secretes cortisol, the famous “stress hormone”. Released in large quantities, cortisol interferes with the growth hormone of neurons and therefore interferes with brain development, says a study by Bruce MacEwen, Rockefeller University, United States, 2007. However, the amygdala is the only structure cerebral that is mature from birth. This is what makes the baby ultra-sensitive to fear, with noticeable repercussions on his brain development. Conversely, when negative emotions are verbalized, the amygdala “calms down” and secretes less cortisol (Hariri, 2000). The stress hormone damages cerebral structures… And in particular the hippocampus, the seat of memorization. However, a secure attachment – resulting from responses adapted to the emotional needs of the baby – decreases the sensitivity to stress of the hippocampus. Likewise, an encouraging attitude of parents increases the volume of the hippocampus. In other words, criticism and punishment prevent the young child from learning, while a benevolent attitude increases his abilities!

Shrinking brain structures

The brain as a whole is affected by repeated stresses, which can have multiple causes: screaming, humiliation, but also emotional deprivation and neglect. So much so that, in orphans under 30 months who have suffered emotional and social deficiencies, we already observe significant disturbances in the activity of the cortex, recorded by electroencephalogram, and therefore a delay in maturation. Certain brain structures react to negative emotions so much that they decrease in volume! Thus, emotional abuse leads to a decrease in the volume of the orbito-frontal cortex of the child. However, this structure has a central role: it intervenes in the regulation of emotions, decision-making, motivation, the capacity for empathy, in the ethical and moral sense … and even for happiness, through the famous “system of reward “.

Often trivialized emotional abuse

The World Health Organization (WHO) calls “emotional abuse” any behavior or words that demean the child: verbal threats, bullying, social isolation, humiliation, but also neglect, when their needs are not met, in particular. letting a baby cry, for example… Behaviors that are very often found in traditional severe education, based on submission and obedience, by means of repeated punishments and reprimands, deprivation, even spanking and others abuse. Indeed, what deeply affects the brain is the use of this emotional violence on a daily basis, as an educational mode. An isolated argument, cries released by a parent at the end of his nerves, do not have this deleterious effect, especially if we take care to reassure the child once calm has returned. Soothing treatments thus promote the development of the prefrontal cortex, the site of higher cognitive activities – logical thinking, reasoning – but also of the regulation of emotions, in connection with the orbitofrontal cortex. We thus observe that children from 9 to 36 months, benefiting from this type of care have a more developed prefrontal cortex and are significantly less inhibited and less aggressive (Hane, 2010).

Live happily with your child ed. Robert Laffont POCKET by Dr Catherine Gueguen, pediatrician trained in non-violent communication and benevolent education

Understand your emotions to cope with them

Because a young child’s cortex is immature, he has no control over his anger. It is his archaic and emotional brain which is in control during these real fits of rage thanks to which he evacuates his internal tension. It is difficult for parents to understand, who see it as mere whims, a form of provocation. And react accordingly, cracking down where it is necessary to reassure, cuddle.

“Neurosciences have come to confirm what we thought intuitively and observed empirically: humiliation damages the brain of young children, empathy promotes their development,” explains Catherine Gueguen. However, in the parent-child relationship, it is very easy to raise the tone and come to a form of verbal violence without wanting to or being aware of it. This is why the road to adopting a mode of benevolent education is long and difficult. Not to mention the fact that the child learns a lot by imitation: the more we cry, the more we have an authoritarian attitude, the more he will do it. Fortunately, the damage of a harsh upbringing, which does not take into account the child’s emotions or his immaturity, can be repaired. This resilience is possible thanks to the great plasticity of the child’s brain, that is to say its capacity to remodel itself in depth according to its environment. It is therefore never too late to change course!

You can also try the EFT method, which consists of free yourself from negative emotions by touching specific points of the body. Applied to children, it helps to overcome phobias and blockages.

 

The end of spanking?

It’s called the anti-spanking law. And ordinary educational violence, or VEO, is the order of the day. Because beyond the gesture, there is a parent-child relationship to perhaps build differently. A slap never killed anyone. It is surely true. But did it grow the child who received it? Did it grow the adult who gave it? Has the relationship between them been enhanced, enriched? The bill against ordinary educational violence aims to prohibit parents from using “against the child means such as physical, verbal or psychological violence, corporal punishment or humiliation”. Positive education, otherwise called benevolent, is perhaps a window of opportunity to think differently about the relationship, the authority … because it is not a question of giving up, there. Children rely on the strength and love of their parents. Guardians stronger than sticks.

Scientific sources: journal ‘Sciences et Avenir’.

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