5 crises that every woman goes through

Puberty crisis

At this age, there is a high risk of suicide, self-harm. Even the common desire to get a tattoo or piercing is often associated with the desire to inflict physical pain on oneself. So the girl tries to drown out the inner pain. This is a time of difficult entry into a new life: it seems that the adult world is rejecting you, and you no longer belong to the world of childhood. The body is changing, and this also adds to the experience. The first love happens, which is often colored by suffering.

How to cope? If your daughter is going through puberty between 12 and 18, it’s important to support her as much as possible. “Not all teenagers trust their parents, and it can be difficult to find a common language with them,” says Veronika Stepanova. – To join your child and understand him, you must first of all remember yourself at this age.

It is important not to talk to a teenager in an ultimatum tone, but, on the contrary, to constantly make it clear that the girl is a value. Find and emphasize its strengths. It would be nice if not only mom, but dad did not forget to remind her that she is growing up and becoming more and more attractive.

Crisis of thirty years

It seems to a woman that she is no longer as young as before. If a woman is not married, it seems to her that she is already less in demand as a bride. She sees the first age-related changes in her appearance, the charm of early youth passes and new existential questions appear: “What is all this for? Why do I live? At this age, a still young woman may suddenly feel the weight of the past years.

How to cope? Understanding that changes are taking place in appearance is a reason to take care of your health more carefully. You can no longer have fun all night, sleep a couple of hours and look great. In addition, this is the first serious existential collision with life after puberty, when we realize: everything is fleeting.

“If in adolescence it was a conflict of a young person who is lonely and uncomfortable in a new world for him, then by thirty the inner adult gained strength and experience,” says Veronika Stepanova. – The experience of conflict can be productive if you treat yourself with attention, and treat the ongoing internal transformation as an important experience.

The worst thing you can do is to succumb to the power of social stereotypes and start “arranging your life.” For example, get a family and children as soon as possible. If you implement this plan imposed from the outside, later internal dissatisfaction will come, the feeling that something intended for you has passed by.

The crisis of thirty can help us realize that life is fast-paced and changeable, and it is important to learn to fully live every current moment that will not be repeated.

Crisis of forty years

Forty years are perceived as a symbolic middle of life. The woman sums up and painful comparisons begin. “A friend gave birth to three children, but I didn’t have one”, “A classmate became a general director, but I’m still a manager.”

The social part of the personality again, as in thirty years, is trying to adjust: maybe we can adopt? Can we do artificial insemination? In the case when a woman is engaged in work that does not bring pleasure, vital fatigue accumulates.

How to cope? “If you find yourself in a vicious circle of comparing yourself to others, think about it: for the sake of a brilliant career, you would have to sacrifice a lot,” the expert says. — Are you ready for this? If you don’t have kids and haven’t done anything yet to make a difference, it’s probably worth admitting to yourself that you’re comfortable with the life you’ve created. Caring for children is psychologically difficult for you. The crisis of forty is an important lesson in being honest with yourself. You go your own way and have the right to any desires and decisions.”

It’s time to take care of your health, to calculate your strength. If you are overweight, it is important to try to normalize it now, before hormonal changes begin, when it will be much more difficult to lose weight.

Crisis of fifty years

A woman approaches the period of menopause, which often provokes a deterioration in physical well-being and mood swings. There may be a feeling that she did not have time for something important in life. She devoted herself too much to her children, or her husband, or her work. It begins to seem to someone that they are not sufficiently realized in the sphere of love, and the search for a new partner begins. There is a rejection of one’s age and attempts to catch up.

How to cope? It is important to understand that many worries and fears are caused by hormonal changes. “First of all, you need to take care of your health, because further psychological and physical well-being depends on how well the stage of restructuring of the body goes,” says Veronika Stepanova. – Love and feelings can remain with you until the end of your life, but you will never enjoy them if you try to live them again, as in your youth. The acceptance of one’s age and the ability to live with it in harmony do not close the sensory world, but, on the contrary, open it up for us in a new way.

Crisis of the Seventy Years

After the menopause fades away, a long period of psychological comfort usually occurs in a woman’s life. However, by the age of seventy, a new crisis may come, associated with the fear of weakness and dependence on loved ones.

How to cope? “Do not hang on children, do not try to subjugate them, and even more so do not manipulate,” says Veronika Stepanova. “Very often, the only accessible and understandable way for us to get attention is to get sick. Then we can be sure that this will oblige loved ones to be there. Our body can go into sickness mode unconsciously to keep our attention flowing.”

However, communication with children and grandchildren will be complete if you can get out of the role of a victim and communicate from the position of a loved one, with whom it is interesting and joyful. Try to listen without trying to immediately give advice and assessments. And no matter how old you are – do not give up your favorite activities or try to find a new hobby that would fascinate you.