We all know how to communicate — with relatives, friends, colleagues, salespeople and doctors. But we don’t always think about how we do it. But this is a whole science — to make sure that the interlocutor not only does not forget about your conversation, but also remembers you with pleasure. We tell you what is needed for this.
If you collect our acquaintances for a lifetime, you get a huge list. Parents, friends, colleagues. Classmates, teachers and coaches. Children, neighbors and husbands. Already a lot. But there is another part of the list: a doctor, a hairdresser, a seller from whom we have been buying bread for many years. Those whom I met on a trip last summer are friends of interest and social networks.
Each of these people plays a role in our life, each makes it happier. So this huge personal database is our most important acquisition. Take care and appreciate everyone with whom life confronts you. After all, in the end a good relationship is a good life. And if this is not the case, then something needs to be changed.
There are people who are at the top of your list — you need to see them as often as possible. We keep them in mind and think that thanks to this our bond remains strong. Meanwhile, a relationship with a person can no longer be called a relationship.
Look closely: what relationships need to be repaired and mended? Where is a restart needed? Where should I press delete?
Call up old school friends, have a picnic with the kids and their friends, offer a walk in the park in the evening to those whom you see only at work. Go on vacation for new experiences and new friends!
Communication principles
It’s one thing to maintain relationships with people, and quite another to make them remember you with a smile. In this matter, the advice of business coach Jim Fannin, who identified 30 principles of good communication, will help you.
1. When starting a conversation with someone, say to yourself, “I wouldn’t want to be anywhere else right now. Only here». People will feel it.
2. Be patient.
3. Give compliments.
4. Try not to express your point of view at the end of the conversation.
5. Don’t take yourself too seriously.
6. Ask great questions and you will get great answers.
7. Be attentive to the melody of the conversation. Watch to see if the other person’s tone changes from positive to negative.
8. Speak and act calmly, and the other person will behave in the same way.
9. Avoid sarcasm if you are joking.
10. Talk about things that will bring joy to others.
11. Reflect as in a mirror the joy of others.
12. Try not to «sell» yourself, your career and life.
13. If the interlocutor wants to change the subject of the conversation, do not deny him this.
14. Never talk like you’re the victim or the judge.
15. Be very careful about sex, religion, and politics.
16. Remember the dreams of the interlocutor and take care of them.
17. Don’t listen to or spread gossip.
18. Elevate rather than belittle the interlocutor.
19. 90 seconds! Exactly so much should pass before you speak out about what does not suit you in the behavior or speech of a person.
20. Always look for a common, interesting topic for all participants to talk about.
21. Never interrupt!
22. Say «goodbye» as if you are already mentally planning your next meeting. This will make the farewell warm and cordial.
23. Do not discuss or talk about anyone behind your back. Gossip has long legs and is able to run to its protagonist. And even more so, sooner or later he will get to you.
24. Unspoken negative emotions eventually turn into negative actions. Talk about what worries you.
25. Smile, or better yet, exchange smiles.
26. If you see that the interlocutor is becoming overly self-critical, do not let him scold yourself.
27. Mark the good deeds of the interlocutor and give thanks for them.
28. If you are discussing an issue, talk about it simply and to the point.
29. Do not try to fill the gap that has arisen.
30. Always tell the truth. Dot.