20 tips for what parents shouldn’t do

Don’t Make School Fees Horror

Trying on a suit, shirts, sundress, shoes, fitting a school dress at a seamstress, running through shops, malls and markets. For a six to seven year old child, this is stressful. As a rule, parents spend almost the entire last month of summer on collecting a first grader. Previously, it is impossible: suddenly it will grow, it will stretch out.

In fact, mothers and fathers themselves get tired of such purchases no less. In fitting rooms, screams and reproaches are sometimes heard. Distribute your purchases so that you buy the portfolio last. As a reward. Since the first grader is interested in this particular subject of the student, and not the shoes and socks in which he will go. In no case do not discuss aloud, “how much more needs to be bought, we have already spent all the salary”: September 1 is a holiday! Let the child not associate it with wasted money, nerves and endless shopping.

You can not scold the teacher

As much as you like the first teacher (and this happens), never, under any circumstances, discuss the teacher with your child. “We got an old woman”, “Yes, she’s some kind of mumbler”, “She doesn’t want to do anything, she just asks for the house!” Studying and being diligent in school depends on your child’s respect and love for the first teacher.

Negative experience is harmful

If you see that your daughter or son, for some reason, does not have time, does not cope with the school curriculum, do not scold, do not make you cram for hours and print letters in copybooks. Each child has its own developmental stages. Don’t let bad experiences take over. Talk to the teacher about your child’s best qualities and develop in that direction. Ask these questions: “What is my child strong?” Yeah, drawing. This means that you participate in all drawing contests. Physical training? All sports competitions are yours with your child.

The child is not formed by a bad experience, but a positive one. After the very first diplomas, the baby will begin to study well in other subjects.

You should … No, you shouldn’t

“You should be an excellent student!”, “You should be the best!”, “Don’t let smart parents down!” Don’t go crazy. The child is in the first grade. Yes, his task is to study diligently, not to forget about additional tasks. And do it for yourself, not for your parents. It is important to understand this even in the first grade. Hang a poster or picture in your baby’s room with the words of motivation: “I’m a student. I can do everything! I’m done!”

Instead of one teacher, there are many teachers

“Let every teacher remember you!” Familiar words? Let’s say the same thing in a different way: “Study well in order to prove yourself! There are many of you. ” A significant difference for a child. You can remember bad behavior, tantrums, and lateness. You can’t scare a child with the colossal responsibility of high school. “Now you will have the most interesting time! There are many teachers, you can choose your favorite subject, and with each teacher the communication will be exactly the way you want! “

I’ll have to quit … sports, dancing, hobbies

In no case! Children often drop out of extra classes in high school. They do not cope with the curriculum, go to the second shift, and place their bets on study. Remember, you cannot sacrifice a child’s hobby. No matter how the child cries that he does not have time, is lagging behind or does not want to. This is age-related. Additional classes, as practice shows, improve the educational process, organize the child.

Do your homework, then take a walk

No! After school, children 10-12 years old must have a rest in the fresh air. Not at a computer, TV, tablet, but walking. Or a dream. The erroneous opinion of many parents that then the head works worse, leads to accumulated fatigue.

You will do your homework even until XNUMX am

It is categorically impossible. Do you need knowledge or essays dictated by you at one o’clock in the morning, statements, reports? Allocate time so that your child can go to bed on time. It is difficult, but necessary.

Don’t relax baby, don’t relax yourself

You can’t say:

• “I’ll clean myself, you just learn.” There should be even more responsibilities.
• “Do it yourself, you’re in fifth grade, you’re an adult.” Lessons still need to be tested and monitored.
• “I’ll deal with your deuce tomorrow!” Teach your child to independently solve school problems, interact with the teacher, retake tests, correct grades.
• “I will find information for you in the computer, and you will choose what you need!” No. Together you are looking for answers, showing how to work with books, a search engine. Checking and working on bugs.

You can not use physical force for poor grades and behavior

Who is in charge of the house, the teenager already knows, there is no need to show your weakness.

We’ll talk about it later!

No. Here and now. You discuss right away why the work was not handed over, why there was a conflict with the teacher, what would not work out in physics, whether you need a tutor: what is the best – home or you will go yourself. The school question is very important and we control it.

I am ashamed of you

All the talk about school annoyed the teenager at all times. Deal with it. You cannot say that the child is “stupid, not of our kind, lazy,” etc. This does not motivate. A teenager cannot be compared to other children. Support him, give your example: “I remember that I also slipped in my studies in the seventh grade, and then I wanted to become a military man and understood what I was studying for. What do you think about your future profession? ” Set goals for him, don’t tell him that you are ashamed of him.

Do not scold… our education system

This is taboo. For a teenager, this is a big plus in his piggy bank “to do nothing.” Since everything is so rotten, why should I try? It’s not my fault, it’s the system. Do not bring up a cursing Svetlakov in front of the TV in Nasha Rush.

Excellent complex

Another bright CANNOT. Many parents transfer their own unfulfilled desires to their child. “We are going to receive a red diploma!”, “Die, but bring an A, a four is a shame!” Carefully slow down. The excellent student’s complex is carried over for the rest of his life. A child is a fine line between successes and failures that shape his personality. There is always someone who is better.

Help your teen to take their place in life, rather than all the seats in the front row at once

Child is not a passbook

“We have invested so much in you … We have spent so much on tutors …” This is the first way to nowhere. In relationships, in a stressful situation on the exam, in the formulation of the plans of the graduate. It is impossible not to speak about it, it is forbidden to think about it. Most schoolchildren could not concentrate on the exam solely because of this attitude of their parents, having an accompanying fear of not justifying desires and … contributions.

August is a month of silence about school

In the last month of the holidays, you cannot strain the student by talking about studies. Only neatly and in a friendly conversation. Give these days to the joy and carelessness of your child. Trust me, it will do him good.

11th grade … Study only

“We’re not going skiing this year”, “All holidays are tutoring and practice tests.” No, no and NO. All psychologists and training coaches say that it is very important for 11th graders to use their weekends correctly. Do not change your plans, let the child also rest on skis, in warm countries, with his grandmother in the village. This is necessary and necessary for further study.

Not the end of the world

The shortage of USE scores cannot be discussed as a personal apocalypse. Review all the options in advance: college, another faculty with further transfer, a year of preparation, a paid basis with a transfer to a budget. This is not a war, but the first adult task of a child.

Boys – sports, girls – fitness

You cannot limit the life of your child. Throughout the 11th grade, mental activities should alternate with physical ones. Often, any additional activities for a graduate become unattainable. There is no time … There is time. Especially for sports. The research experience proves that it is these children who do better on exams, set goals clearly, and cope with stress.