20 common parenting mistakes

If you do not want to harm your children, do not:

1. Giving them too much freedom of choice

Parents often think that the more options a child has, the better. But in fact, children literally choke in this sea of ​​​​abundance.

2. Praise children for everything they do

Today, many children are addicted to praise like a drug. They won’t lift a finger if they don’t get rewarded.

3. Trying to make children happy

They have another task – to learn to seek their own happiness. You will not be able to make them happy by willpower.

4. Over-indulge

Where does this lead? Children begin to think that happiness consists in possession. As a result, their life turns into a race for goals, the achievement of which never brings them satisfaction. And this can lead to addictions and obsessions.

5. Overload children

A typical example is sports. Many parents mistakenly believe that constant employment will save the child from problems. In fact, this often leads to burnout or aggressive behavior.

6. Think that the main thing is intellectual development

It is a great temptation for a parent to convince a child that there is nothing more important than intellectual success. But such children often become arrogant and consider others fools. Who wants to be friends with them, or at least communicate?

7. Believe that religious education will instill in them the right values ​​​​and save them from everything bad

As soon as such a child is faced with the manifestation of hypocrisy from parents or publicized spiritual leaders, the house of cards will quickly collapse.

8. Shutting up topics like sex

Many parents are horrified by the very idea that you can talk about sex, and they protect the child in every possible way from such conversations. As you might guess, this does not lead to anything good – there are times when 13-year-old girls get pregnant just to shock their relatives.

9. Excessively criticize the child for mistakes

One of the common misconceptions is to think that being extremely demanding makes a child better. Such children are encouraged to excel in everything from appearance and the ability to win the favor of other people and ending with success in sports and studies. But if you fail, they think they are worthless. They are so angry that sometimes it comes to self-harm and even suicide.

10. Shame, ignore, threaten

Never say or hint that you will not love a child if he is guilty. Some parents think that in this way they can get obedience from him. But this is an imaginary victory, because the fear of being rejected settles in the soul of the child.

11. Load them with responsibility beyond their age.

It is not uncommon for children to be made responsible for their brothers and sisters. Growing up, in most cases they lose the desire to continue the race, explaining this by the fact that they no longer want to be educated.

12. Allow children to sit in front of the TV and computer as much as they like.

The list goes on – video games and smartphones are also from this series. Of course, total restrictions do not lead to good, but unlimited access to entertainment harms both the physical and psychological health of the child.

13. Don’t let them get bored

There are parents who believe that children should be constantly occupied with different things – so long as they never get bored. But if adults constantly interfere, then the child will not develop creativity and the ability to independently cope with boredom.

14. Release children from responsibility for their actions

Some parents seek to relieve their children of any experience associated with their mistakes: for example, they immediately buy a new toy instead of a broken one. Or if a teenager has problems with the law, they do everything so that he avoids responsibility. And then they wonder why the child does not appreciate anything.

You need to understand that losses help us become wiser and learn from our own experience what can and cannot be done.

15. Don’t let them play “dangerous” games

For example, children from forest kindergartens, where it is customary to spend time outdoors and freely explore the world around them, are much less likely to get sick and cope with problems more successfully than those who attend ordinary kindergartens.

16. Do not question children

Children feel loved and have no trouble sleeping when parents are genuinely interested in how their day went and what’s going on in their lives.

17. Do not read books aloud

Of course, we are talking about younger children. When the baby is read, he has to sit still, not make noise and use his imagination. These skills will be useful to him in school: it will not be so difficult for him to listen carefully to the teacher, and his imagination will allow him to develop creativity.

18. Too early to deprive a baby of a pacifier

It is believed that the pacifier is a visible symbol of insecurity. Instead of trying to quickly wean the child from it, parents need to create an atmosphere of safety. Then the need for a nipple will disappear by itself.

19. To overfeed

And then ask if the child wants a supplement. We have an ancient program that remembers the times when access to food was not so easy. Therefore, children, like most people, will not refuse another serving. Over time, their stomach will stretch and eating disorders may develop.

20. Spanking children

Corporal punishment doesn’t work, only love does. It is not uncommon for people who are brought up on the principle “spare the rod, spoil the child” grow up angry, aggressive, deceitful or intimidated.