Contents
We are glad to welcome you to the blog of Valery Kharlamov! Networking is the creation of connections, both for successful activity and just for mutually beneficial communication. In today’s business world, every leader must learn the basic rules of networking, in some cases even attend a series of trainings where they teach not only how to make acquaintances, but also get the most out of it.
What is it?
Everyone knows that connections are everything, it is impossible to build a business or quickly solve a complex problem if there are no acquaintances who can help. Well, who, for example, did not seek help from friends doctors, so as not to sit in a long line at the hospital? Or did you not receive some kind of certificate ahead of time, just because one of the relatives works in a state institution and has the opportunity to issue it immediately, as required?
There are few people who will deliberately complicate their lives by refusing the support of relatives and friends. Therefore, we are sure that in the experience of almost every person there is a story, and more than one, when getting to know someone turned out to be useful.
But networking can be more than just positive. Sometimes people abuse help, starting to actively use other people without giving anything in return. Or, on the contrary, they provide a service to everyone, but do not declare themselves, preferring to cope on their own or wait for others to guess for themselves.
It is important to maintain a balance in the give-and-take process, if only there is a failure on one side — the relationship will no longer be healthy, and may either stop, or cause more harm than good. Equivalent exchange is the key to stable, strong and close relationships. And no matter what, energy, services, material values …
Rules
1. Mass events
Attend whenever possible any events where you can cross paths with as many people as possible. They may be related to professional activities, such as conferences, symposiums or presentations, but do not lose sight of visiting theaters, parties and exhibitions, where people from different spheres, but with power, gather.
For example, Donald Trump moved to Manhattan, and you know why? Because the wealthiest people lived there at that time, and he understood that getting to know them would help him realize his goals. And he was right, as far as we can see now. And how exactly it helped him, you can find out from this article.
2. Where to start dating?
You will look ridiculous if you just go up to, say, the head of a large company, and ask: «Let’s get acquainted?». At the very least, it is unlikely that he will help you in the future after this. Everything should be natural and unobtrusive.
Do you know what the main secret of effective communication is? If you do a favor to a stranger, or even someone who doesn’t like you, he will feel obligated and will want to repay the debt. This method was invented by Benjamin Franklin, you can learn more about his methods here. In addition, if you just hold the door, or pick up a fallen piece of paper, this will be a great reason to start an unobtrusive and positive, pleasant conversation.
3. Nonverbal
You should not hide your emotions, trying to portray equanimity in order to give more solidity and significance to your image. Did you know that when talking, people pay attention mainly to non-verbal manifestations, since they are the true ones, and the person unconsciously reads them?
Facial expressions and gestures take away 55% of the attention of the interlocutor, 38% are given to the voice, with what tone it sounds, how alive and emotionally colored. And only the remaining 7% goes directly to the words that you carefully selected in advance to strike on the spot.
Therefore, you need to study the article about non-verbal communication. In addition, if you are not interested in the field of your activity, then, during the acquaintance, you will not arouse enthusiasm in the interlocutor. You can captivate and interest only if you sincerely love what you do. So work on that so you don’t have to give out just a dry, rehearsed phrase about your job.
4. Speech
Be sure to practice your speech at home. In front of a mirror, a dog, a loved one … At the same time, keep track of how you feel, do you really experience the emotions that you are trying to convey?
Come up with several options for phrases with which you can familiarize yourself and briefly but interestingly present yourself. No need for long sentences and abstruse words, it is advisable to include at least a little humor in order to win over a new acquaintance.
5. Price of the word
In order not to create a bad reputation for yourself, always keep your word, otherwise you will not be taken seriously, and business conversations with irresponsible people are not conducted. Look at the article “Why is it important to keep this word to another person?”, It describes in detail what such behavior is fraught with.
6. Don’t gossip
In no case do not participate in discussions of someone’s misdeeds, gossip and conspiracies, no matter how powerful and significant the initiator of such a conversation may be. This is not professional, not ethical and not humane, which in the future will also not play into your hands.
7. Unobtrusive
If you managed to talk to someone, you should not be obtrusive, do not tire the other person with your presence. Your task is to be remembered, and you can form relationships later, gradually.
We met, exchanged contacts, if there was an opportunity or a reason for this, and that’s it, go further, there are still many meetings ahead that will be useful to you in the future. And by the way, do not aim to immediately advertise yourself or the company, so you will only repel, cause irritation and a desire to get rid of you as soon as possible.
8. Tips for introverts
For introverts who seek to minimize interactions with other people, they will have to make a choice, either to stay in their comfort zone, or, for the sake of their desires and dreams, sometimes get out of the shell for useful communication. Try to treat this process as a sport, constantly practicing, you will “get involved” and will not react so “painfully”.
Man is a creature, in its essence, capable of getting used to any conditions, it is only important to be sensitive to oneself. If you notice that you already have excessive contacts, and you can’t stand it, immediately run “into the mink” to gain strength and rest.
9. Business card
To exchange contacts, use not only electronic gadgets, sometimes there is simply no time to stand and write down a phone number. Stock up on business cards, and, choosing a convenient moment, present to a new friend.
There is one caveat — at mass events, where there are a large number of intersections, you can mix up and give not your business card, but received from someone earlier. Therefore, make it a rule to place, for example, your contacts in the right pocket of your jacket, and strangers in the left. Then you certainly can’t go wrong.
10. About help
There are unspoken rules that require you not to lend money to friends, and, accordingly, not to ask. You can provide a service by acting as a switch, that is, by bringing some people together with others.
Believe me, this is more appreciated and causes fewer cases of breakups, hostility and, in general, anger in the end. And do you know how the word networking is translated? Net is a network, and work is work. So, weave your web so that it will benefit you.
11. Reminder about yourself
Exchanging business cards is half the battle, if you don’t remind yourself of yourself in the first week, then consider that there is simply more waste paper in your offices or wallets. Over time, you will simply forget about the existence of each other, so look for an excuse to consolidate the first phase of the relationship.
Just don’t ask for it right away. Send photos together if you have them, just send a request on social networks or a message in which you briefly remind you of the place of your meeting and ask how you feel.
12. Improve your communication skills
You have to be interesting so that there is a desire to meet you again. It is clear that you should not use profanity, go straight to “you” or chatter incessantly about your own, not noticing the partner’s reactions. But there are other nuances that can push away, see the article about communication skills.
13. Who to be friends with?
Choose not only useful people, pay attention to those who are interesting to you. Communication should be pleasant, only then it can develop into friendship and partnership. And remember what was said at the beginning? When they just want to use for their own purposes — a negative kind of social networking that can do you more harm than good.
After all, a deceived person will tell about the unpleasant experience of contact with you to other people who could also be useful to you, but no longer want to communicate. To understand whether another person really arouses your sympathy and interest, think about whether you would like to meet with him together and chat over a cup of coffee or tea?
14. Meetings
Find an excuse to spend time together. Let it be a trip to the cinema, where you accidentally invite a new acquaintance, or a game of bowling and so on. If he joins your group of friends, then at first, given that he knows only you, he will already be more disposed towards your person, experiencing a feeling of closeness and trust.
Conclusion
Finally, I want to recommend that you read the book by Keith Ferazzi and Tal Raz «Never Eat Alone». Take care of yourself and loved ones!