Contents
Hello dear blog readers! Man is a social being, and has not only the intellect familiar to us, that is, aikyu, but also emotional. Among other things, they are closely related to each other, that is, realizing their feelings, a person better recognizes strangers, respectively, it is easier for him then to understand what is happening around, to anticipate events, and this affects just intellectual development. So the development of empathy is extremely important for every person who is in society and, moreover, wants to be successful.
Methods
1. Selfishness
To become empathic, you need to learn to go beyond the boundaries of your own egoism, and notice other people, their needs, experiences. This can be done by observing how they behave in some situation. And also by assuming what is actually happening to them, why they do something, what they want to achieve with it, and what facial expressions, gestures and postures are present at the same time.
And this is easy to do, just on the way to work, looking closely at fellow travelers, or those who make up the company in line. Imagine where they are going, who might be waiting for them, or who needed to buy medicines for them at the pharmacy. Such a game, in addition to entertaining you, will also help develop both creative imaginative thinking and emotional intelligence.
2. Hear
No empathy training methods will help until you learn how to not only listen to your interlocutor, but also hear him. At first glance, it may seem that there is nothing easier, but in fact it is not an easy task. After all, it is important not only to perceive the incoming information, but also to process it, give a feedback, that is, share your feelings in response to the story told, thoughts and ideas, your own experience, and so on.
But, in any case, do not devalue the words of someone who shares something with you, claiming that he is worried because of nonsense, or, even worse, interrupt him. By such actions, you will not only show that you should not open up, but you will not experience sincere empathy, involvement in someone else’s life story.
When asking any questions for clarification, ask yourself first of all, why do you need this? To satisfy your curiosity, to get valuable material that will come in handy in the future, or the need to still understand what is happening with your interlocutor in order to help him at least free himself from accumulated emotions? See the article «What is active listening and what are the techniques for its development?».
3. Recordings
Get yourself a notebook in which write down all the existing emotions. After that, every day choose one of them, and try to indicate at what moments you feel it. For example, “I feel sad when I see flowers wither”, “I am happy when I hear my child laugh”, “I get angry when I am not understood”, and so on. It is desirable to make at least 10-15 points.
So you will not only gain knowledge about your personality and character, but it will also be easier for you to understand the people around you. By the strength of the effect, these actions will be like a full-fledged personal development training, the main thing is that you do the work conscientiously.
4. Nonverbal
Be sure to study the theory of non-verbalism so that you can successfully apply knowledge in practice, and not create images and fantasies that are far from reality and about another unknown person. There are many books on this topic, I recommend that you first read the article, where you can choose the most interesting literature.
5. Do not judge or criticize
Each person has their own life story, and it is wrong to say that you would certainly have acted differently. You were not in the conditions in which this person grew up, you do not know what experience of building relationships he adopted from his parents, if he had any.
You don’t know what he had to face before he became what he is now. What are his internal resources, thinking style and character traits. Therefore, it is very important to learn tolerance for another person, only in this way you can develop your emotional intelligence.
6. Games
The best exercises are games, as you will learn and develop completely imperceptibly to yourself, that is, without using willpower. Plus, they capture, captivate and bring them closer to others, which is why they are considered social.
Try to search, suddenly in your city they organize periodically evenings for playing poker, «Mafia» or «Monopoly», «Rat Race», «Immaginarium» and so on. In extreme cases, you can buy the necessary attributes and invite friends. Watching the change and manifestation of other people’s emotions, you will better learn to understand and feel them.
7. Play with friends
Ask a friend or family member to join you in an interesting activity like telling a compelling story. But the means of communication should be purely non-verbal, the transfer of information only through facial expressions, gestures, postures and just movements. First, decide which of you will be the listener and which will be the narrator.
The task of the narrator is, in principle, clear. The listener will have to carefully observe his interlocutor, and at the end share what he understood, what he felt, what the story was about. Then switch roles. Try to listen to yourself, what was more difficult to do, convey or understand? So you can discover your, so to speak, weak points, which you will have to work on.
8. Films
While away your free time watching movies, preferably based on real events, dramas and even melodramas. Psychological thrillers are also useful, which will encourage reflection on what is happening and what the essence of the picture is.
I recommend starting with those listed in this article. By the way, there are such psychological groups where, after watching the film together, there is a discussion, an attempt to play roles in order to understand what the main character was experiencing. Look for similar meetings near you.
9. In company
For this task, you will need company, and the more the better. One person leaves the room, and returning, he must recognize who is looking at him with what emotions. The rest of the participants should try to convey feelings only with the help of a glance, without using facial expressions and gestures.
For example, a look full of rage, or love, tenderness, fear, disgust, anxiety, and so on. After that, the next person comes out, the rest agree on the transmitted emotions, and so on in a circle.
10. In a strange place
It is believed that in order to understand another person, you should put yourself in his place. And this is true, although it seems to be a difficult task. Imagine your friend, or, say, a colleague who angers and annoys you all the time with his behavior.
Close your eyes and think that you are him, call yourself by his name and try to dream up, answering questions about his life that will help you understand why he behaves the way he treats you and what he achieves in general.
You can ask those that concern you directly, but I want to give simple examples of questions to make it clearer:
- What scares me?
- What do I love the most?
- Do I have close people whom I can trust?
- What do I want from life?
- What am I striving for?
- Who can I rely on?
11. Actor
Take up acting, that’s how you increase all levels of your social intelligence. Getting used to the role, you will significantly increase the range of emotional reactions, which means that it will become easier for you to be aware of yourself, adapt to the world around you and, of course, understand other people.
If there is no time to attend theater circles, it’s okay, just rehearse in front of a mirror, read aloud with expression and appropriate facial expressions and gestures of poetry, prose and even newspapers.
12. Example
Think about which of your acquaintances you think has a high enough level of empathy. Try to observe what this person says, at what moments, how he looks at the same time and the like. Try to analyze his behavior, appropriate the nuances you like, that is, put aside the accumulated knowledge in your piggy bank.
Conclusion
And that’s all for today, dear readers! Finally, I want to recommend the article “9 practical tips for constant work on yourself”, it will help you act and develop in order to achieve your goals. Take care of yourself and loved ones!