Contents
- 1. “Sleep with your child during the day”
- 2. “Don’t carry around all the time”
- 3. “Why won’t you give her a pacifier?”
- 4. “You dress the child too easily. You should always wear a hat “
- 5. “You are holding the child incorrectly. Let me show you how it should be “
- 6. “Stop using diapers, they are infertile”
- 7. “You can’t let dad bathe your daughter, it hurts her”
- 8. “She is already a year old, it’s time to shave her head!”
- 9. “Give her a piece of bacon, her teeth will cut easier.”
- 10. “But we lived without telephones, and there were no child car seats then!”
In general, the very fact that others begin to share their wisdom when no one asks them about it, terribly enrages. But some of these “wisdom” especially spoil the mood.
“I raised three of them, I already understand what’s what!” – an elderly neighbor expressed resentment to me. She just reached out to pat the cheek of my baby, peacefully lying in the stroller. First of all, will you like it if I start grabbing you by the face on the street? Secondly, I have no idea how clean Galina Fyodorovna’s hands are. Maybe she comes from the market, where she felt all the potatoes. Anyway, my child is my rules.
During the time that Sasha was growing up, I was given more than a dozen tips on how to behave, how to live and how to feel. Mostly without asking, just out of a desire to share wisdom. I collected the ones that pissed me off the most.
1. “Sleep with your child during the day”
Cool advice. The diapers wash themselves, the dishes and the floor will probably wash each other, the food will also cook itself. You know, a young mother has a little more to do than is commonly believed. And I also want life not to be limited to diapers alone. Do the exercises, wash your head – that’s all sorely lacking, as well as communication with the outside world. I would still like to keep abreast of news not only from the “We ate” series. Where can I get it all the time?
2. “Don’t carry around all the time”
You would also advise to give the child to roam properly, it is good for the lungs. If the baby needs to be carried in my arms, of course, I will carry it in my arms. To swing, to press, to inhale a sweet smell, to mutter tenderness and stupidity. Will you get used to it and won’t get off your hands? You know, I have not seen a single child who would be carried to school in their arms.
3. “Why won’t you give her a pacifier?”
Because we only recently parted with a nipple. And I will not say that the parting went smoothly. Yes, this is a good way to calm a child down. But to teach again, barely weaning it, is somehow too much, isn’t it?
4. “You dress the child too easily. You should always wear a hat “
I was always – even before pregnancy – amazed by mothers who dressed the child not with a layer warmer than themselves, but as if for a different season or another area. For example, the Arctic. Will you put on a hat at +24? And the blouse? Why did you take off the pantyhose? Do you think that the child is colder than you? Why? In general, such advice has always raised me more questions than thanks for the advice.
5. “You are holding the child incorrectly. Let me show you how it should be “
Hello, we’ve arrived. I hold it in the way that is convenient for both of us. And to give your daughter to you – she is not a simulator to demonstrate the skills of a professional mother. What is the best way to carry a hefty stroller to the fifth floor?
6. “Stop using diapers, they are infertile”
First, this is nonsense. Imagine, yes. It happens that people believe in nonsense. Yes, I buy disposable diapers. No, I don’t like reusable for many reasons. And in general, do not you find that this is too intimate a topic to discuss on the street with a person who is not too close? Tell me something about the pace of development of my child. And about my mothering skills. Then we will disperse very dissatisfied with each other and forever.
7. “You can’t let dad bathe your daughter, it hurts her”
Dad can bathe the baby, calm down. When a child ceases to be a baby, then he himself can somehow wash something under the supervision of his mother. Don’t demonize your father. When the child’s gender identity begins to form, if she suddenly begins to feel embarrassed, of course, only the mother will have to do the bathing. But I think it’s not very ethical to walk in front of a child without clothes. And bathing a baby is normal.
8. “She is already a year old, it’s time to shave her head!”
One of the hits in my personal rating. It is folly, instilled for centuries, to shave a child bald as soon as he is one year old. Like, it’s good for the hair. Trichologists, for example, say that it is harmful. You can damage fragile hair follicles if you carry out such inhuman experiments on a child. And I trust specialists more than my neighbor, even though she raised three of them.
9. “Give her a piece of bacon, her teeth will cut easier.”
You know, you can even give your children a piece of wood to chew on. And that will be more useful than a piece of fat for a fragile gastrointestinal tract. There are a bunch of ways to help a child when his teeth are teething, but for some reason they advise always such a fierce extreme that you want to run away, close the house with all the locks and prop the door with a cupboard. But you just have to nod and smile.
10. “But we lived without telephones, and there were no child car seats then!”
A lot of things were missing. Let’s also remember our favorite, about “women gave birth in the field, and nothing.” Nothing of course. They died along with the newborns, and all the things – just think, there is little sadness. The world is changing, somewhere for the better, somewhere for the worse. He is not the same and will never be as friendly as (perhaps) he once was. You have to adjust, whether someone likes it or not.