Contents
- 1. You are bored
- 2. You never get angry
- 3. You are jealous
- 4. You don’t have sex at all
- 5. You keep everything to yourself.
- 6. Do you have children?
- 7. You have a lot of divorced or unmarried friends.
- 8. Both of you don’t get enough sleep.
- 9. Your partner is more attractive than you.
- 10. You immediately had sex
If you’ve ever tried to find the perfect relationship formula, you’re not alone. Explorers, philosophers and lovers are constantly pondering this. We decided to go from the opposite: we collected 10 factors that can complicate relationships in a couple. Perhaps they will help you not to make a mistake.
1. You are bored
Couples who participate in interesting activities together are much happier than those who are bored, according to a study from Stony Brook University (USA). “In order for life together to please for a long time, it’s not enough to not have problems and conflicts,” says psychologist Arthur Aron, author of the study, “partners must make life together exciting.”
2. You never get angry
Partners who argued a lot in the first year or two of a relationship, but were still able to discuss their differences, become happier over time, according to a study by the University of Florida (USA)1. “The short-term discomfort of a fair argument is good for relationships in the long run,” said McNulty of the University of Florida.
3. You are jealous
Envy or ostentatious indifference to the partner’s success worsens the relationship. Recognizing and congratulating your partner on an achievement increases relationship satisfaction, according to research published in The Journal of Personality and Social Psychology.
4. You don’t have sex at all
If the number of sexual contacts increases from once a month to once a week, your enjoyment of life and relationships, according to statistics, will increase.
5. You keep everything to yourself.
Relationships will be happier if you have common interests and open, friendly communication. Even if you don’t like something, tell your partner directly about your feelings and desires – you yourself will be surprised how easy it is for you to find a compromise and negotiate.
6. Do you have children?
Many of us see children as essential to a happy and meaningful life. However, childless men and women are more satisfied with their relationship and feel more valued by their partner, according to an Open University study. Of course, one should not refuse to procreate, but after the appearance of heirs, it is better to be more attentive to one’s own needs and desires of a partner.
7. You have a lot of divorced or unmarried friends.
You are 75% more likely to get divorced if you have divorced friends among your friends, Brown University (USA) showed2. “Divorce can be “infected” through social media, it spreads like a rumor and pushes friends and friends of friends to break up,” said Rose McDermott, who conducted this study.
8. Both of you don’t get enough sleep.
Lack of sleep can lead a couple to collapse. Men value relationships much more if they get good sleep. Lack of sleep in women is also fraught with relationship problems, according to a study by the University of Arizona (USA)3. “Sleep affects not only our psychological and physical health,” says study leader psychologist Brant Hasler, “but also the health of our loved ones.” Does this mean that healthy sleep will help solve all other problems in the family? In any case, this is where you should start. In addition, difficult issues should not be discussed if one of the partners did not get enough sleep.
9. Your partner is more attractive than you.
The attractiveness of wives is of great importance for men: their relationship satisfaction is higher, the more attractive they consider their lady of the heart. This conclusion was made by psychologist Andrea Meltzer from the Southern Methodist University (USA) after 4 years of observation of 450 heterosexual couples. It is curious that Benjamin Carney, a social psychologist from the Institute of Relations at the University of California (USA), came to the same conclusion earlier. He believes that men who consider themselves more attractive than their wives are not disposed to take care of the needs of their partner.
10. You immediately had sex
Immediately having sex and entering into a relationship is not the best way to create a lasting couple, according to research at Cornell University (USA)4. For those couples who first looked at each other and waited at least a month before making love, the relationship was more successful and stronger.
1 nydailynews.com/life-style/health/happy-marriage-angry-article-1.1141019#x7Wd8xv2hZjGPVDC.97
2 pewresearch.org/fact-tank/2013/10/21/is-divorce-contagious/
3 well.blogs.nytimes.com/2009/06/10/marriage-linked-with-better-sleep/?_php=true&_type=blogs&_r=0
4 psychologytoday.com/blog/fulfillment-any-age/201208/take-it-slow-if-you-want-your-relationship-last