«Take it and do it»: what’s wrong with leaving the comfort zone?

We live in an era of achievement — the Internet and glossy talk about how to set goals, overcome difficulties and conquer new heights of success. At the same time, one of the key stages on the way to a better life is considered to be getting out of the comfort zone. But is it true that we are all in it? And is it really necessary to leave it?

Who hasn’t flinched at another call to get out of their comfort zone? It is there, beyond its borders, that success awaits us, coaches and infobusinessmen assure. By doing something unusual and even stressful, we develop and gain new skills and experience. However, not everyone wants to be in a state of constant development, and this is normal.

If the rhythm and alternation of passions with calm periods in your life are comfortable for you and you do not want any changes, then other people’s advice to change something, “shake it up” and “become a new person” is at least tactless. In addition, motivators and advisers often forget that everyone’s comfort zone is different and the way out of it depends on what a person’s character is. And of course, on how resistant he is to stress.

For example, for someone a big step in overcoming oneself is to perform on stage in front of a full hall of listeners, and for another person, a real feat is to turn to a passerby on the street for help. If for one “action” is going for a run near the house, then for the second it is participation in a marathon. Therefore, the principle of “just get it and do it” works for everyone in different ways.

Two questions to myself

If you are still thinking about leaving your comfort zone, then you should check if you really need a change.

To do this, answer the key questions:

  1. Is this the right moment? Of course, it is impossible to be XNUMX% ready for something new. But you can try to “lay straws” and make it easier to get out of your comfort zone — because if you are completely unprepared for the intended step, then the probability of failure is high.
  2. Do you need it? Try something new when you really want to. And not when friends are pushing you, and not because all your friends have already done it or a well-known blogger recommended it. If foreign languages ​​are hard for you and they are not needed for work and life in general, you should not waste your energy, nerves, time and money on learning them.

Just be careful not to cheat and say «I don’t need this» about something that just seems difficult. For example, you are not sure that you are ready to go to a friend’s party, where there will be a lot of strangers. What keeps you from acting outside your comfort zone: fear or disinterest?

Find out the answer using the eraser technique: imagine that you have a magic eraser that can erase your anxiety. What happens when you use it? It is likely that, mentally getting rid of fear, you will realize that you still want to accomplish your plan.

Where are we leaving?

When we leave our comfort zone, we find ourselves in another place — and this is definitely not a «place where miracles happen.» This, perhaps, is a common mistake: people think that it’s enough just to “go out” somewhere, and everything will work out. But outside the comfort zone are two other areas that are opposite to each other: the stretch (or growth) zone and the panic zone.

Stretch zone

This is where the optimal level of discomfort reigns: we experience some anxiety, but we can process it into motivation and get fuel for productivity. In this zone, we discover opportunities that were previously unfamiliar, and they lead us to personal growth and self-improvement.

There is also an alternative concept introduced by the psychologist Lev Vygotsky for teaching children: the zone of proximal development. It implies that outside the comfort zone, we only take on what we can do with the safety net of a more experienced person until we master the action ourselves. Thanks to this strategy, we learn new things without strain, do not lose the desire to learn, see our progress and feel more confident.

panic zone

What will happen if we throw ourselves out of the comfort zone without sufficient resources — internal or external? We will find ourselves in a zone where the level of anxiety exceeds our ability to cope with it.

A typical example is the spontaneous desire to radically change and start a new life here and now. We overestimate our abilities and can no longer control the situation, and therefore we are disappointed and feel overwhelmed. Such a strategy does not lead to personal growth, but to regression.

Therefore, in order to avoid unnecessary stress, before doing something new and atypical for us, you need to carefully listen to yourself and assess whether the time has really come for this.

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