Midlife Burnout: How to Know if It’s Happening to You

Work, family, household chores — there seems to be no end to it all. Zero energy, motivation too. We owe everyone and everything — at work, to children, to elderly parents. Moreover, global questions are beginning to disturb: have we made the right choice in life? Did they go down that path? Not surprisingly, at this point, we are often overtaken by burnout.

We tend to think of burnout as a condition that results from long-term chronic stress at work. But you can burn out not only in the performance of your work duties.

It is not easy to notice that this happened to us. First, because this condition develops gradually. Secondly, because its symptoms are easily confused with a midlife crisis. Therefore, mid-life burnout is easy to miss and “run”. And so much so that it will lead to serious clinical problems.

What are the signs of «midlife burnout»?

1. Physical and mental exhaustion

Yes, middle-aged people, as a rule, have to combine a lot. And a career, and raising children, and caring for elderly parents. Days are similar to one another, with the only difference being that each throws up their own difficulties and problems. There is practically no time left for rest and entertainment.

As a result, many complain of sleep problems, loss of concentration, difficulty making decisions, anxiety, and feeling lost. Add here stomach problems, headaches and discomfort of unknown origin. Many attribute this to aging, but in fact, chronic stress is to blame.

2. A dark view of work and relationships

Burnout, like depression, changes our perception of ourselves, the people around us, and possible prospects. Often this leads to the fact that we begin to notice only the worst in our partner, household, close friends and colleagues. And it is very difficult to get rid of this outlook on life.

Those who go to doctors often complain that they lack patience. This means that conflicts with a partner are becoming more frequent because of household chores, money and sex. The common future does not appear in a rosy light at all. As for work, clients tell psychologists that they seem to be stuck professionally, their previous activities no longer bring satisfaction.

3. Feeling like nothing is working out

Middle-aged people often feel like they have failed on all fronts. Everything they do is somehow too superficial, careless. Or one thing — for example, work — turns out well, but in other areas it is a complete failure. There is not enough strength and time for a family and a loved one, and because of this, a feeling of guilt arises. It seems that everything is in vain, and there is simply no time to sit down and think about what is wrong and where to move on.

4 strategies that can improve the situation

1. Take an honest look at what’s going on and pause.

Burnout is serious business. This is a clear signal that you need physical and mental rest. If at all possible, slow down as soon as you notice the first symptoms, take a break, and set boundaries. Believe me, if you burn out completely and lose the remnants of physical and mental health, it will only worry your loved ones. Everyone else will not care, you will just be replaced by someone more efficient.

2. Review your schedule

Perhaps, even if you have been sewn up for a long time, you continue to say “yes”, agree to help and hang unnecessary responsibilities on yourself. Helping others is great, but first you need to help yourself. And even more so, you should not do this just out of habit. If you’ve been living on autopilot for a long time, it’s time to change that. Go through your schedule and ruthlessly cross out everything you can get rid of. Get in the habit of only adding something new to your «stuffed» schedule if you’ve taken something out of it.

3. Plan time for yourself

Yes, it’s difficult, especially if you don’t have free time at all and haven’t had it for a long time. But if you don’t, you’ll end up burnt out. Every day, plan a small and not too time-consuming activity that will bring you pleasure. Ideally, you should spend at least part of this time alone to think about the future and plan your next move.

4. Find what makes you happy

It’s useless to force yourself to feel happy again — that’s not how it works. All you need is to find something that gives you even a little joy. What you liked before, or what you have never tried. Believe me: once you experience the feeling of joy and inspiration again, you yourself will begin to find more time for such activities.

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